i'mma be a cheeto puff in the next life

Lately I've been thinking a lot about what I would want to be in my next life. At first I came up with something typical yet exciting like a bird, however, I have since decided that I have much more interesting things I'd rather be if I'm comin' back a second time.

Since I'm fairly convinced that I have at least 9 lives I've made a list of all the things I'm gonna be and why...enjoy!
1. Human...slightly boring, also not my decision.
2. Cheeto Puff. YES. You saw it correctly, I want to be a cheesy puff. I think I'd like to be the one on the bottom of the bag that never gets consumed by humans. Instead I somehow make it to the dump (I have my theories on how this will happen, but for times sake we'll just assume I make it). Anyway, once at the dump I'll obviously be the happiest cheesy puff on earth with other Cheeto variety friends as well. Honestly, I doubt life could get any crazier than that. My death, I assume will come from a liquid of some sort which will essentially melt me down to nothingness.
3. For my third life I wasn't quite sure what I'd want to be, but after some more thought I decided that a car tire would probably be best. Why, you ask? Well, easy. Duh. I would be the tire of someone that likes to travel all sorts of exotic places. Then they'd sell their car and I'd probably end up dispising the new car owner and therefore I would make sure the have a blow-out at the most incovienient of times. Suckas!
4. My forth life would be drama-filled and oh-so-fun. I would totally be a cell phone. Or, if possible, every cell phone in the world. Wouldn't it be super rad to read all the latest gossip, romance drama, and everyones sercrets?! I would hope to die rather quickly though because it'd probably get old quick. I'd be a Razr phone since they don't last long. It'd be one hell of a ride though! Hope I don't drown!
5. Five was a bit lame, but still, I have as many lives as I want so I'm allowed to have a few lame ones every now and then. I would be a raindrop. I would either want to land in the ocean and live for a quite some time just...being water. The other option would be to land on some lovers noses or something cheesy but cute. You know how I do...
6. Well since I like writing and I like reading, I guess I'd have to choose a journal for my 6th life. I am not quite sure if I'd just be a specific indiviuals journal or if I'd just be all journals for the sake of being a journal. Seems a little more fun to choose one person's journal...I'd choose Ben Folds or my sister...maybe my mom. Just think, if I were my mother's journal I might understand her a little more...
7. Lucky number seven. I'd be playing cards in Vegas, hands down. And I'd make sure the underdog of every game played with me won. Eventually I'd be found out and probably burned or at least thrown away, but wouldn't that be freakin' awesome while it lasted?!
8. I'd be a basketball for life number 8. I'd be pro at first and then work my way down to someone's house and sit in their living room for a while. Eventually I'd lose my value as most material things do and I'd be thrown out or lost.
9. I think for 9 I would want to be a newspaper or magazine article of some breaking news or huge event that people would refer to for years to come. I think that'd be pretty neat.

And there you have it. My list of a few of the lives I'll have someday. So, if ever you're eating Cheeto Puffs and you come across a broken little one at the bottom, please for the sake of all that's good, do NOT eat it. You never know who he or she may really be...

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