Why do people remember things from the past as better than they were? Sometimes I find myself reminiscing about things that, at the time, were miserable and find myself thinking they were okay or even good. I'm not sure why or what purpose this serves but tonight it has got me feeling really sad. Some days I think I have it all figured out and days like today I feel like I have no idea.

For the last two weeks I have been eating healthy and taking care of myself. I have lost 10 pounds thus far. Today was my first day in the gym in over 3 years. Wowza. I thought I was going to die but it felt really good! I'm excited to get back in shape and maybe start running again. Clearly, I need an outlet and running used to be the best one and then drinking got in the way. When I stopped drinking I figured I would just naturally get healthy and back in shape but it turns out, it was quite the opposite. So now, more than 2 years sober, I am going to do it.

On a brighter note, I'm going to California this weekend to relax and celebrate my birthday. Not that turning 28 is a "bright" side, but it's happening regardless. And besides, on NPR the other day they said that 40 is the new 30...so does that make 30 the new 20? I'm hoping! I'm gonna rock the last couple of years in my twenties, since apparently it's actually my "teen" years. Here's to living life and loving the shit out of it, no matter what.

I am craving sushi. And In n Out. And this blog should end now. :)


I'm tired: Part 1

But I have a goal not to miss any of my classes. So I figure I should at least go to all of them the first week. I have a confession to make: The previous two semesters, I didn't go to the first week of class. Not one damn class. Why? Because it's boring and pointless. Since it's my last semester though, I figured I would go out with a bang!


And it begins...

School starts today! My last semester (if I pass all of my classes) at SUU is finally here. Whew. I thought this day would never come and now it's here! I'm taking some pretty rad classes and I'm excited for something to keep me busy at work but I'm mostly excited that I don't have to work weekends anymore.

Monday is the worst day out of the week for lots of reasons:

  • Post Secret comes out on Sunday. Why? I wish it could come on Monday so I would have something to look forward to on this dreadful day. Frank, get on it. 
  • I have to come back to work. And I'm really tired.
I guess Monday isn't so horrible since I can only think of two things...so whatever. Here's to my (hopefully) last semester of undergrad. Unless I decide to get a second Bachelors degree, which I hope I don't because I'm pretty sure that would be worthless. I guess only time will tell. 

I'm going to California for my birthday and I am stoked. This week better fly on by! 


Silver Lining Kind of Day...

Last night as I walked into work, I stepped in a pile of tomato sauce on the floor that no one had thought to mop up. Gross, but whatever. Then I noticed that absolutely nothing had been done or moved, including the food on the roller grill, since I had left that morning almost 17 hours prior. After a few minutes or hours of complaining to my girlfriend, I cleaned the place up and did the jobs that no one else was going to do. Things started to get better.

Then, later last night, someone that I have no desire to have contact with popped up out of no where. Why? I have no idea. It made me feel weird and very uncomfortable. Luckily Sof came to the rescue, as always. I got off work this morning and was feeling better about life. 

After sleeping for a few hours and getting home from my meeting, I was determined to have a good evening before coming back to work. Rocko hadn't really been outside a lot, so I took him on a walk. It was such a nice night and I was enjoying the stroll until I literally thought I was going to have to shit on the lawn by Rocko. I practically ran home and didn't leave the bathroom for an hour...the rest is history.

After a failed attempt at a nap, I took Calv out in the backyard to brush him because he is shedding like a mad man. After a few minutes, I felt someone watching me. I discovered my, probably really nice, old, creepy neighbor staring at me. As I started to get up to go inside, he came over to start another awkward conversation. In the last two weeks or so, we have had our first meeting/conversations and we have both lived there for two years. I'm not sure why he's creepin' now, but it's weird. More weird that he's probably seen me naked, but whatever. Gag. 

Back in bed for another attempt at sleep before work. Fairly successful and I even slept longer than planned. Sof saved my ass again and called to wake me up. I rushed to the bathroom to shower and you'll never believe what happened....the light flicked on and then off. Sweet. I showered in the dark and then dug in the closet for some light bulbs. As I was looking, I realized that in the two years I've lived in this apartment I have never had to change that light bulb. I guess that's the silver lining? But mostly that I made it to work in time and even put on a clean shirt.

Just when I thought things couldn't get worse, I had a creeper at work. I'm used to the creepy truckers who think I want to date them. I'm used to the drunk/high/whatever dudes that come in the middle of the night and think I want to sleep with them. That's old news. It's just the non-truckers that really freak me out. They have no reason to be here and yet, they are and they are gross. After politely telling him I didn't want to date him or have a threesome with him, he left and I called Sof. 

This day seems like a nightmare that came true. I know that just one of these events in a singular day would be nothing more than a good laugh, but all of them in one day just seems too much to even be real. I checked the moon to see if that's why it was creep day but it's not full. Not even a little bit. 

So, as I sit here at the truck stop wishing I was home in bed I just have to laugh. I know I'm being dramatic and that I probably just need sleep, but man...life is funny sometimes. Right now I'm grateful that I have a job, even if it really sucks big time right now. I'm grateful that I don't have to keep people from my past in my life and that I'm happier than I ever thought I could be without them. I'm really grateful for indoor plumbing and for Imodium. I am definitely grateful for blinds (even though I need curtains- coming soon). I'm grateful for electricity and light bulbs, even though my shower in the dark was quite nice. I'm grateful that I'm not a lot lizard at the truck stop and that I don't have to flirt with the creepy peeps in here. 

Mostly, I'm just grateful that I didn't forget to wear pants to work today. Seems like that's the only thing else that could have gone wrong. I wonder what tomorrow holds...


I just had 1.5 days off and it was just what I needed. Lots of cuddle time with the babies, evening strolls, and plenty of sleep. I don't wanna go to work tonight.