Okay, okay...for ya'll who are already to the big 2-5 mark and beyond, chillax. I don't think you're old if you're over 25. I'm just a freakin' out a little bit because I always thought that by 25 I'd have a completely different life than I do right now. Ever since I was little I always thought that by 25 I'd "have it all" : sexy husband, white picket fenced in house, little dog in the backyard, 8 (effing) kids, and the president of the young women's.
Honestly, I've never had, and will never have any of those things...at least not in the way I had planned for so many years. And I'm perfectly okay with it. Sure, sometimes I wonder how much different or "easy" might life could be if I did choose my childhood path and it almost seems worth it. Then I snap back to reality and I remember that I'd end up in a mental institution if this : sexy husband, white picket fenced in house, little dog in the backyard, 8 kids, and the president of the young women's, was my life.
I don't want a husband. I could settle for a studio apartment in a larger city. A dog, sure, why not? 8 kids, dream on. Church? No thanks.
Yes, I'm freaking out that I'm turning 25 because I have absolutely no idea where my life is going and where I'll end up next...but I guess that's also what I love about my life so much. I have nothing tying me down or holding me in one spot. I am free to blow with the wind; I hope I never get tied down.
Naturally, I don't want to end up alone and I don't intend to do so. I just don't want the same things I always thought I'd want. Sometimes it's confusing to try and break out of the mold that was made for me and what I wanted for so long; sometimes I don't know if I'm making the right choices.
Confused as I may be, I do know one thing, I know that no matter what I do I'll always have my family and friends and what more could a girl ask for? So to all of you who get to deal with my "quarter-life crisis" freak out sessions, just know that I love you. And until I'm done freaking out and deciding what to do next, sorry I'm a little bitch. xoxo
So here's to making the big 2-5 the best it can be! I can't wait to see what life hands me next! Bring it on! (and trust me, I know I have a while until my birthday)...but just in case you want gift ideas, here ya go:
- books. i love books.
- music is nice.
- a lover? maybe...
- scrabble shit. <3