oh the joys of paper thin walls: part 1

Have you ever lived in an apartment where the walls seem so thin it's like they are non-existent? 

Ever have the pleasure of listening to an old, dirty, construction worker, chronically drunk and his mid-40's, cocktail waitress girlfriend have sex but only on the days they aren't threatening the other persons life? 


Does this sound like something you'd like? Well then you've come to the right spot, folks! Step right up.


Once upon a time, there lived a not-so-happy-or-functional couple, Jackie and David. [names have not been changed to protect them, as I have not actually met these two in person...only glimpses of their life in which I strain my neck to hear through the walls].

Although tonight was not my first time with Jackie and David, this will be the beginning of there story. Their love/hate/everything in between story. Tonight started out with the bed squeaking. I always get excited when I can hear that old (I'd imagine) bed start rockin'...but tonight it was just Jackie getting in bed while telling dear old David that she "doesn't love him" and that he's a "nasty old pig" (which, I'd agree with). 


David won't let up; he usually digs himself a deeper hole in which Jackie uses to her advantage. She tells him he can't sleep in the bed with her. Then he gets mad. She moves to the guest room; the talking gets muffled. We stop listening. Bed squeaks again; we're back into position in order to get the best sound quality. Repeat five times. 


Now, usually it ends in make-up sex...my favorite! Not tonight...not yet anyway. 


This is the story of David and Jackie, my wall-mates. Every night is a new adventure and I'll be here to update ya'll on the situation. Whether you like it or not...


Until next time. TTFN.