Spring Break and stuff

• Spring break starts tomorrow after my class. I'll post updates later about how it goes. 
• I'm doing a research paper on domestic violence in the LGBT community- very interesting. 
• I took my last midterm exam today! Thank God it's over. 
• My Black History class paper is done and submitted. Whew. 
• I took my grandparents to Parowan on a drive today- we had lunch at the Dairy Freeze. Fun times. 
• In my Sex and Gender class we watched a documentary called "Two Spirits"- so sad. I can't stop thinking about it. 
• I missed the bball game tonight due to sleep deprivation. I'm fine with it, but sad that the season has come to an end. What will I do now? Oh wait, research projects!
• I miss Sof. duh.
• I don't know what I ever did without my iPhone. For realz. Life must have sucked. ha ha
• So stoked for some sunshine and cruising time with my bestie this weekend. 
• I ordered like 5 iphone cases- but they are for the wrong iphone. Damn. 

Happy March!

Holy smokes, it's March already. I thought we'd never get out of winter but slowly it's coming. Thank goodness.

• One week until Spring break!! I have a lot of homework, projects, and exams to study for over the next few days and then I'm free. Can't wait!
• For Spring Break I'm going to California with April. Oh what an adventure this shall be....
• I have 22 months sober!
• I'm going to Tegan & Sara and The XX with Sof in April. Can't wait. 
• Calv is so much more cuddly and calm these days. He still has his crazy moments, but he loves me and that's all that matters. 
• I took grandpa and grandma for a drive with Joey on Wednesday. They're so cute. I'm glad I get to see them often. 
• Today I slept through class (oops) and then was able to wake up and hang out with Ape for a couple of hours and then cleaned my house. I love having my house clean and feel so much better that way. 
• I'm doing laundry at work. What what? I can't complain about my job....
• April and Ty bought a cute house....or they are going to buy it anyway! They found out their offer was approved today. Sweeeeet!
• Two SUU bball games next week- bittersweet since the season is coming to an end. :( 
• I miss Sof. Of course. 

Warning: don't read if you don't want to read mushy stuff

I'm feeling lucky tonight. I have so much to be grateful for and so many wonderful people in my life (and kitties).

I am especially grateful for Sof.  She is a bomb cook. Especially grilled cheese; that's a big plus. She does my dishes and makes my bed after I run out the door for school (when she's here, of course); she folds my laundry, too. Sof even goes to basketball games with me even though it's not really her thing- or at least it wasn't her thing...maybe it's growing on her these days.

I am a crazy, usually-way-too-tired-to-be-alive, bitchy lady and she is always so calm and nice. She's laid back when I'm being anxious and uptight. I like that. When I want to have a "craft" night, she goes along with it. And when I ask her to paint random things, she does it. She always makes me cute and very thoughtful gifts- that's my favorite.

Sof will go on crazy adventures with me. I love driving with her and just talking/jamming to music. I would go anywhere with her.

Oh and even though she hates feet, she gave me a foot massage. If that's not rad, I dunno what is...

We won't even talk about when she popped my zit.

Mostly, I'm just lucky to have such a thoughtful, amazing girlfriend. I never thought life could be so good! I could go on- but we don't want to get too mushy or anything.
Sorry if you already threw up...

my other full-time job

The past three days have been spent in the SUU Centrum Arena, my bed (for shorter time than I would like or need), and work.

Today alone I spent 8 hours (yes, 8) watching basketball. I didn't leave the building once. Mostly because it was snowing and I didn't want to go out in it; also because there was basketball going on and I wanted to watch.

I can honestly say that I'm tired of watching basketball. I think partly it's because after watching basketball all day I didn't get to go home and crawl in bed- I came to work instead. I feel like I have three full-time jobs (work, school and basketball) and I don't want to do any of them right now.

Oh well, the past 3 days have been glorious. I'm counting down the hours until Monday when I get to sleep.

HAPPY!

Today I am the happiest I've been in years. Not just today. But in general. I am busy and I like it, even though sometimes I'm a huge nightmare. And I have also had to learn that I can't please everyone. Sometimes I need sleep. Or a day off. And sometimes other people don't understand that, which is understandable. My family, close friends and girlfriend have all been very supportive and understanding though...and that's what is important to me.

Sof came to Cedar last Wednesday and stayed up Tuesday this week! It was so much fun to have her here and to get to spend so much time together. I wish she was here all the time!! We spent a few hours driving on Sunday and ended up in Parowan and then in Colorado City, Arizona. Weird, but so much fun. I love adventures with her. I love anything with her, actually.

My grandpa turned 90 on Wednesday so Buddy and I took my grandma and grandpa to lunch at their favorite place- Sizzler. I can't say that I had ever been there, but it wasn't terrible and it was cute to see how excited my grandparents were to get out of the house. After lunch (I was running on 36 hours of no sleep and wanted to crawl in a hole) my grandpa wanted to go for a drive; I really did not want to go. Since it was his birthday, I sucked it up and we went for an hour and a half drive. It was so much fun and I'm so, so glad that I didn't pick sleep over time with him. It turned out to be a very simple and wonderful day.

When I woke up this morning I had this feeling that I should go visit my grandparents. I usually see them a few times a week but lately it's really hit me that they won't be here forever and I need to spend as much time as possible with them right now. I went up to their house to say hello before I was supposed to go to class. When I walked in my grandpa thought we were going for a drive and got so excited- I couldn't let him down, so I ditched class and we took an hour cruise. He lost his drivers license a year ago- and I think that took part of his soul. That man loves driving! I love it too, so it works out. I don't regret missing class at all.

After my class got out at 8pm tonight I heard basketball in the centrum at SUU- so I went in and watched the last half of a game alone (true loser fashion). It was the 2A State play offs today. April came and joined me for the last game and then I came to work. I should have been doing homework all night but instead I played Temple Run and fake slots on Facebook. Oops.

I'm sure if you're still reading this you're bored out of your mind but that's okay...I don't want to forget how happy I am right now and so I'm writing it down.

The next few weeks are going to be a crazy mess of projects for school, working overtime, basketball games ( I need them for my sanity. ha ), and then a nice vacation with April for spring break. Sometimes (like everyday, at least once) I want to give up. Sometimes life is overwhelming to me and it doesn't seem like I'm going anywhere or that all this work is worth it...and then I look at where I was less than 2 years ago and I'm so grateful. I know it's cheesy but I don't care- I'm so grateful for my life today!! I wouldn't change it for anything.

A lot of my friends are going through some hard times & have lost people they love- it reminds me that everyday really is important and that I should live with no regrets.

Life is good. Just don't talk to me on Monday or Wednesday after 4pm (just ask Sof)....I need my beauty rest. ;)

Weekend according to my iPhone

Calv is cool: Top 10 Reasons

1. When we fight, Calv just goes under the bed for a minute and when he's cooled down he comes and cuddles with me. Besides, we never fight...so it just works out.
2. He listens to me. Any day, all day. And he never tells anyone, either.
3. I don't have to buy him things for his birthday, Christmas, etc. He is happy with my leftover tuna juice and his regular old cat food. I do sometimes spoil him with the $1.00 cat treats at Wal-Mart though.
4. He's always waiting for me to get home. He's cute like that.
5. He lets me take a million pics of him a day. He doesn't even get mad when I post his "bad" pics on instagram.
6. He's a homebody just like me.
7. We both love eggs and toast. And soup.
8. Calv hates football. Me too.
9. He keeps me company while I do homework. Or sleep. Or shower. Everything really.
10. When someone knocks on the door, we're both content staying put and not answering it. Being social isn't really our thing. ;)

Feelin' Lucky

Today has been crazy. And long. Mostly long. I started another class that meets Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7pm-9pm. That makes my day 10am-9pm on those days and then I come to work at 11pm. To say the least, I'm tired. I know lots of people who do this and do it well, but I'm not like that. I need my sleep or I'm not nice. I really like the class though, or at least so far. My brother is in the class, too. So that's cool. I wish I had more time for school- I really like my classes by sleep usually trumps any extra studying or activities. Oh well.

Next week on Tuesday I'm going to SLC with the mentors from Horizon House; I'm still not exactly sure why, but whatever...I'm excited.

Then on Wednesday or Thursday, Sof will be here to hang out for a few days. I'm beyond excited about it.

I'm a tired bitch, but life is good. Now to study for my exam on Thursday. Eff you, linguistics.

Random shiz

School blows my mind sometimes. I love learning new things but sometimes it also makes me very sad. I'm reading a book about human trafficking right now and the statistics are very eye opening and appalling. Women and children are sold for upwards for $15,000.00 for the sex trade- how is this even real? Ignorance is usually bliss, I guess. 

I have a big exam this week and I don't feel prepared at all. It's in Language, Thought and Culture which is an anthropology class; turns out it is more grammar and language than anything...not my strongest point. Plus it's based on the Hopi language- and I'm completely lost. Oh well, I guess it's too late to turn back now. Better get to studying!

Today was the Super Bowl. I am proud to say I didn't watch one bit of it. Plus, I got to watch the commercials (the only semi good part) on youtube tonight anyway. I did eat pizza at my parents house with Joey though...so I guess that's another good part of the party. I really hate football. 

This week is the start of nightmare February. I will now have class from 10am-9pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I am taking a Black History Month class and it's only in February- I'm really excited to take it but I feel like I'm going to be a huge mess living on caffeine even more than I already do on those days. 

The new Tegan and Sara album is seriously great. I have been listening on repeat for a long while now. I just love those gals. 

Just some late night/early morning ramblings. Again.

Last night I was getting ready to hop in bed when I noticed Calv was bleeding a little bit. He had ripped his stitches out and there was some unknown thing hanging out of him (I'm not a cat anatomy buff, but it looked a lot like a testicle). Since he was neutered about two weeks ago and wasn't supposed to lick his stitches, I felt like a really horrible (and crazy) cat mom. Luckily Sof told me to calm my ass down and go to bed. And I did.

When I woke up Saturday morning and it was still there and looking horribly nasty, I decided to call the emergency vet at 8am. She told me I could drive out to her house in Parowan and she'd take a look at Calv; I called April and she came with us for the ride. The vet, Dr. Wilson, looked at Calv and gave him some antibiotics in case it was infected and sent us on our way. So...$10.00 later, a drive to P town and Calv still has some weird thing hanging out of him. At least I know he won't die (I hope).

I swear this cat gives me more anxiety than anything else in my life ever has...and I love him more than anything, too. Here's to hoping that someday we will have an anxiety-free life.

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In other news, there's a really creepy guy at the truck stop right now. His truck is "broken down"...aka, I don't think he drives a truck and he doesn't want to sleep outside. I don't blame him though since it's probably -13 outside. I just don't want to hang out with him. Or talk to him anymore. Ugh.
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If I die, check the dumpster.
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For real though....

Weekend!

I am so glad the weekend is finally here! Plus, I don't have to work Friday night and I have no obligations or plans; I plan to keep it that way. I have one class Friday and then I'm going to sleep, homework it up, cuddle with Calv, sleep some more, etc. I am quite thrilled about it. 

Today I went to the SUU basketball game with Ape. They were down by like 15 at the half but came back to win it by 10. It was a fun game to watch! Glad I wasn't a hermit this time. 

On Wednesday Britt came over and we had dinner and watched TV. It was nice to hang out but I've realized how anti-social I really am... As much as I love seeing my friends and I usually even have fun doing it, I'm just as content to be alone at my house. EEk... Not sure if that's normal. Oh well. Good thing I rarely have time to sit at home and do nothing anyway. 

Two weeks til Sof comes to visit! So stoked!

Ramblings

• It's 4am and I just finished an assignment where I had to assess the Klingon language. Klingon is a made up language from Star Trek. WTF. Weirdest shit of my life. 
• I'm glad I never had a baby. So much more to say on this, but I'm just gonna say...thank God. I love kids and I'd like one someday- I'm just glad I didn't have one when I was 18. Or even last year. 
• Monster energy drinks are keeping me alive. Again....always. 
• I have been sober 21 months and 1 day. What?!
• After I get off work, I have a day off. Yay. 
• School is about to get real crazy. 
• I miss Sof. 
• Calv has been so cute and cuddly since his nutz got chopped off. I hope he's just mellow and not dying or something. I'm sure I'm being dramatic. 
• Thoughtcatalog, pinterest and your blogs are keeping me occupied when I should be reading "Language, Thought, and Culture". Poop.
• I never thought I'd love a phone. But I love my iPhone. I don't love that I actually have to charge the sucker though. 
• The diesel pumps and the soda fountain are broken at the truck stop. Not really sure why I'm even at work. Oh well. 
• I get to see Sof soon-ish. I can't wait. 
• My sister got a BF and I haven't talked to her since. Ahem. And maybe she's busy being an adult and stuff, too. Call me, muffin. 
• Two basketball games this week+me= happy

Life is good. I'm tired all the time. School is kicking my butt. I wish my gf lived here....or that I lived there. But I'm happy and I'm sober. And hopefully I'll graduate one day and then I can move. One day...........

First week (or weeks) of school blues...

For some reason, the start of this semester just felt horrible; nothing was going the way I thought it should go and I was getting burned out with life. Usually I'm most motivated at the beginning of the semester and it slowly fades out, but not this one. For the first few weeks of school I have been depressed and lethargic. I know that sounds dramatic, but I can't think of any other way to describe it. Maybe it has to do with breaking up with my girlfriend, working too much, not sleeping regularly or all of the above. 

Today I feel like a switch just flipped and I'm ready to roll. I know that it's Sunday night and I just had two days off work and got plenty of sleep, but I'll take it. Things with Sof are going really well and I got to spend the weekend with her. I went down Friday morning and hadn't slept since Wednesday night. I was, to say the least, a hot mess. I was beyond tired and I didn't feel well at all. Sof was very kind and patient while I cried. Then we slept for a while before going down to Fremont Street. I had never been there at night or sober and it was awesome. We just walked around and watched people, mostly. We left around midnight and went to bed. It was rainy and perfect. 

The next day Sof had a training from 11am-4pm, so I just hung out and relaxed. When she got off work we ate dinner, watched a special on polygamy (saddest thing of my life), and went to bed early. We were both pooped and it felt nice to actually get some sleep. I woke up early and just lounged around until we ate at my favorite place- The Omlet House. Best thing of my life. Seriously, if you're in Vegas you need to eat there. It's divine. 

I cried when I left Las Vegas: I hate leaving Sof. And I also hate the cold of Utah. Double whammy. Mostly I just miss Sof. The drive home with filled with Ben Folds Five blaring, wind and lots of Diet Coke. Just the way I like it. I was planning to go straight to bed when I got home but decided I should be social- so after a meeting I went to my grandmas house for dinner with the fam and then grabbed a coke with April. As much as I want to be living in Vegas, I know I'll miss my friends and family here in Utah. Good thing it's close and I can come visit lots. I think it will be nice to have Buddy and Andi living in Vegas, too. They are moving down there in August and hopefully I'll be going at the beginning of next year, after I graduate. 

Sometimes when I get in a slump, all it takes to get me going again is a little sleep and some time with Sof. She always makes life seem better. I'm happy to report that I will be starting school officially tomorrow. Ha ha. (Don't worry mom and dad, I have been doing my homework...I just haven't really tried very hard). 

Holy Poop, I'm Tired...

Story of my life: I'm tired.

When I was getting out of rehab my biggest concern was that I would be bored. I was reminded of this a few days ago and I just can't help but laugh about it...sometimes I wish I was even a little bit bored, but I know that'd be worse than being busy. School is officially kicking my butt. Not the actual homework part (yet) but the long hours at the school and then coming to work after. Bad planning on my part, but not a lot I could do about it.

I'm thinking about having a "sick day" tomorrow so that I can get my house clean and sleep before a long weekend of working. I'm at work right now and I don't remember feeling this worn out/tired in a long time. My bed sounds heavenly and I wanna cuddle with Calv. Lets be real, I'll probably go to school and I probably won't sleep for 15 hours like I want to...but a girl can dream, right?

I know I often complain about being tired and wanting to sleep- and it's true. But I am also very grateful that I have a reason (lots of them) to get out of bed. I really do love school and I love having a job that allows me to study while I work. I have it pretty good and I am going to try and remember that more.

This weekend I get to see my aunt Mar and Annie Bee (and her husband & their new baby!!). It should be pretty stellar. Oh, and April & I have officially booked our trip to the Redwoods. Not sure why we're going other than April wants to go and I like driving. Yay. :)

Love & Stuff

While I have been having my own little pity party, one of my dearest friends since I've been sober has been struggling so much and I didn't even notice. Today while I was at a mentor meeting, I asked where he was and everyone looked at me like I'm crazy (because, lets be real....I am).

Apparently I'm the most oblivious person in the world and had been so stuck in my own world that I didn't notice he had been missing for a couple of weeks. I went over to his house right after my meeting and just seeing him made me want to cry. I have never seen him like this and I hope I don't even have to again.

Although our "choice" of drugs is quite different... when I saw him today all of the memories of me feeling like shit came flooding back and took away all of my desire to drink; it also made me realize that I'm not invincible. This person is one of the strongest, most caring and thoughtful people I have ever met...I didn't think he would ever relapse. But that's the reality of addiction and it makes me sad. The thought of losing my friend makes me so sad and also reminds me that it could be me.

Last year, as part of the mentor program, we did a candle light vigil to honor and celebrate the lives of addicts who have passed away; this year I am taking on the project as part of school and so I have been thinking a lot about it. Sometimes now that I've been sober for a while I forget how awful it felt right before I went into rehab. I absolutely hated myself and wished I could just die. Since being sober, I haven't wanted to die and I usually really like my life (even when I'm being dramatic)- but I also forget how much life sucked before...hence why I think I want to drink sometimes.

I hope I'll always remember why I don't drink. Even though sometimes I choose to remember the great times I had while I was drinking, it's easy to forget all the really shitty things and I don't like that. I also hope that I can try to be a better friend to all the wonderful people who have helped me so much over the past 18+months and beyond.

Weekend recap in pics

Under a Rock: The Chronicles of a Crazy Girl

Sometimes I wish I could just crawl under a rock and stay there until I felt less crazy...or forever, whichever comes first. I am realizing more and more why I used to drink and I should probably do something about it before I start drinking again. I suck at real life pretty bad most of the time and I usually mess good things up and I have no idea why.

Here's to hoping someday I can be normal and happy without drinking.

You know it's bad when...

I miss an SUU basketball game.

I never thought I'd willingly miss a basketball game- but it happened tonight. I opted to sleep. Weird. I felt a little better when I woke up and now I don't wanna poke my eyes out all night at work. Plus, I have a long day tomorrow and I didn't want to be exhausted. I'm still bummed I missed the game though!

While I was sleeping it was apparently a blizzard outside. I woke up to 5 or so inches of snow on my car...I just left my car running the whole time while I showered and got ready and didn't have to do any work to remove it. That's what I call awesome. 

Tomorrow I am going south- to the land of warm weather. At least it's warmer than here, I hope. I can't wait to turn off my phone and relax. It's a much needed break from reality and hopefully I'll get some things done that I need to do, too.

Oh and thanks to Britt and April for keeping me sane. I wish you guys were coming with me this weekend! xoxo

Just made a good decision

So, as I'm sitting here at work dreading going to my 8am math class, I had a realization. I can't fail math; I can't fail any of my classes, in fact. I wanted to take math in order to get it out of the way- mostly so I could have an easy last semester in the fall. Now that I've had months to ponder, I have come to realize that an 8am class wouldn't cut it. I wouldn't go to the most fascinating class in the world at 8am on my days off work...so I have decided to take math in the fall and skip it this semester. No I don't have classes until 10am everyday and I feel much better about life.

yay.

I also added a couple new classes that I'm pretty excited about. This should be a good semester!

My last hours of freedom...

And I'm sitting at work playing on the computer. Typical.

In other news, April and I went to the SUU game (womens) tonight and they won! It was a great game and I'm glad she made my ass get out of bed to go. Usually I'm the one dying to go and can't wait but today I would have been fine staying in bed until work...but I'm glad I got out for a bit.

I am very excited for school to start again! I forgot how boring working graves was without any homework to do- it's been a nice break, but I'm ready for school again. I'm sure after a few days I'll wish I had another break...but that's life. I had some big plans for Christmas break, but most of it was spent working or with Sof- so I didn't get much done, but I had fun.

I'm pretty excited for Monday: I am getting a new phone and a new straightener for my hair. Both things which I have needed pretty badly for a while now and have been waiting to get. It will be a happy day! I'm still counting down the days for my mini vacation, too. Can't.come.soon.enough. I love getting out of Cedar...even if it is only for a short time!

Freeeeezing up in here.

It has been getting prettttty cold at night in Cedar; last night the pipes froze at work and I had no running water and they didn't thaw until 4pm. I need to move to Hawaii. Or Vegas. Or Arizona. Or anywhere that the "cold" weather is still above 30 degrees.

Today was kind of a bummer day. I got off work late and then went to the school to buy my books- and I also finally bought a coat..it's more of a jacket, but I like it. After that I slept until April got off work and then we got coke and cruised for minute and then I slept again until I had to work. I hate it when I don't do anything but sleep- I just couldn't get out of bed. I'm pretty sad about my break-up and a little depressed that it's so cold outside. I need to pull my head out of my ass and start being productive. School starts Monday and I don't feel prepared at all, aside from having my books. Hopefully when I get off work today I'll feel a little better and can get some things done around my house.

In other news, I finally have a mini vacation planned. I mean, it's hardly a vacation- but it's one day out of Cedar...so I'll take it. It's not until the end of January, so now I'll have something to look forward to.

Anyway, this is a lame blog. Bye

The past two days have been interesting. I broke up with my girlfriend. Again. This time for good. I parted with a couch I've had since before I was born (my parents old couch) and a table that I bought to "pinterest". I've decided to revamp my house and in doing so, a few things needed to go because it was getting pretty cramped in there. Today I spoke in front of a large group and remembered how much I don't like doing so. I get so frazzled. Oh well, it's over and I'm alive. Oh, and the women's basketball team lost tonight. Damn. 

Oh well, there's always next time. Maybe someday I'll find love. Maybe someday I'll get a real couch. Maybe someday the women will win a game. Who really knows? All I know is that right now, I'm okay. In fact, I'm actually happy. Life is good and I'm ready for some crazy adventures!

I'll post pics of my "new" and improved living space when it happens. Hoping to get a lot done this weekend!

2013

I always make very specific resolutions and rarely (if ever) finish or even start them. What I have learned about myself over the past year or so is that I don't like strict rules...I like to have guidelines and then figure out a way to get there. So, for my 2013 resolutions they will be broad enough that it gives me room to play with it and still accomplish something that I want to do.

• I want to take more time for "fun". Oftentimes on my day off I just sleep or I'm hermit status. I know I need sleep and it's okay to be alone, but this year I want to focus more on my relationships with friends and family by making an effort to go out more and have fun. 
• Pass all my classes again! In a perfect world, I would say I don't want to miss class- but I think that would be setting myself up for failure. If it happens, great... ha 
• Go on a fun vacation. I don't care where as long as it's not in Utah. I need a beach or something. 
• Don't use work as an excuse not to do something. Sometimes I choose to go to work early so that I can avoid being social. Lame, right? 
• Read more. I forgot how much reading school takes; last semester I didn't read one book that I didn't have to read for school. I don't like that. I need suggestions!
• Be healthier. Be on a semi-normal sleep schedule- working graves kind of puts a damper on that, but it's doable and I need to do it. Eat better. Exercise. You know, the usual. 
• Don't commit to more than I can actually do. I always feel bad saying no, but then I end up saying yes to way too much sometimes. And then I get burned out and want to quit everything. Balance is something I need to work on, obviously. 
• Start working with my sponsor again. 
• Take time for myself to do projects I want to do.
• Be true to myself. I know what I want but sometimes it's hard for me to be assertive enough to follow through. 
• Take more pictures, write more, and listen to more music. 
• Get organized: use a planner of some sort and throw away my junk. 

Hope everyone had a wonderful New Years Eve 2012 and that ya'll are ready for an even better 2013! 

Happy 2013- but first, 2012: a review

As I've been reading other blogs about what people did in 2012 I feel like I didn't do anything. Perhaps I didn't do many exciting things, but it was a good year.

January:
I got to spend oodles and oodles of time with my grandpa- mostly at doctor visits. Oftentimes I was impatient, tired and ready for bed during these appointments but looking back I'm so grateful that I got to spend that time with him.

February:
Went on my first "real" date since being sober. Obviously didn't turn out...but it was fun and I learned that dating is supposed to be awkward and fun. Sober dating is not something I'm good at or even really enjoy but at least we got that outta the way.

March:
I have no idea what I did around this time in my life. Whoops.

April:
Joey turned 19 and I celebrated one year of sobriety. Holy cow, time flies!

May:
Joey graduated high school!! I graduated Horizon House- wahoo.
I took a trip to Vegas for the first time since moving back. I learned that I'm more of a home body and would prefer to be in bed by 10pm rather than staying up all night (too bad I work graves).
Oh and I got my house all to myself when the roomie moved out.

June:
I reapplied to SUU. I have no idea what else I did. Lagoon maybe?

July:
Found out I got back into SUU, hit up Lagoon and SLC gay pride with my bestie and stressed about school.

August:
Started school!! Starting dating Sof.

September:
Turned twenty-freaking-seven. Gag. Calv turned 1!

October:
No clue...school.

November:
I cooked a turkey and had  friends over for Thanksgiving.

December:
Passed all my finals, got good grades and had a nice and relaxing break from school.

Up next, some goals/resolutions for 2013!

Happy Birthday

Happy birthday to the best dad in the world! I love you!! 

Christmas and stuff

Christmas has come and gone. Whew. For a minute I thought I wasn't going to make it this year. I was able to spend Christmas Eve with my family at my grandparents house; it was nice and relaxing. I was going to sleep at my parents house with Joey and Enna but decided to sleep in my own bed at my house. I woke up at 5:30 Christmas morning and went up to my parents house. I woke everyone up and we opened (watched Joey) presents. It was a lot of fun and I got spoiled. So did Joey.

After we were done opening gifts and hanging out, Buddy and Andi came up- and all the kids took moms car for a cruise to listen to Joey's new CD- "Now 44". ha ha.

Then we all went to grandma's for breakfast and pictures. Good thing I haven't showered or brushed my hair in like 4 days. I'm sure I'll love having these pictures.

I went home and slept most of the day and in the afternoon we went to Les Miserables (everyone minus Buddy, Dad and Joey). It was such a good movie and I'm glad I went- although it was nearly 3 hours long....which, in my book, is too long.

Now I'm at work. I'm tired, I'm sick and I wanna be in bed. 4 more hours. :)

Christmas Eve

Today is Christmas Eve- the morning of Christmas Eve, actually. As I'm sitting here at work thinking of all the shopping I still need to do tomorrow, I'm kicking myself for putting it off so long. On the other hand, I kind of like waiting until Christmas Eve to shop. It seems thrilling and exciting. ha ha...okay, not really.

The past few days have been so crazy. Between work and Sub4Santa I haven't gotten much sleep and I was starting to get a little crazy...or more crazy than normal. I have been stressed about Sub4Santa for a few weeks because last year we had much more done a lot sooner. This year we didn't know if we were going to be able to pull it off (time and money). Of course it all worked out and it was the best year we've had yet!

We weren't able to schedule a time to do the bake sale until Dec. 22- which is rather late, but we made more money than we've ever made doing a bake sale, plus we had more donations of money and gifts than ever before. Not only were we able to provide Christmas for over 20 kids- we gave Christmas dinner to 7 families. The best part was that the day before we were to deliver gifts, we took on a new family. The mom has something wrong with her heart (I don't know the medical terms) and the daughter is losing her ability to communicate. We had enough extra money that we were able to buy her an iPad!

All in all, life is good. People are good and I have cried (happy and crazy emo) more than I want to admit. Merry Christmas, everyone! :)

I thought once school ended I would mellow out and be less stressed, non-hormonal, and carefree. Turns out, it's quite the opposite; one might even say I'm more stressed, more hormonal and worried about everything.

I'm stressed that the Sub4Santa project isn't done yet and Christmas is coming so quickly.
I'm stressed that I haven't gotten any Christmas presents done yet. Some are started and some are almost done. But not one is completely ready to go.
I am on my period (3 weeks late) and more hormonal than I should be at any given time.
And mostly, I'm worrying about my grades. I won't find out until Wednesday and I think I'm giving myself an ulcer thinking about it.
On top of it, I babysat Joey last week while he was sick and now I'm sick.

So, today when I get off of work I'm going to go home and clean the shit (literally, cat shit) out of my house. Then maybe I'll get some Christmas shopping done and put together a couple presents. And I should probably shower and shave. My arm hair is long enough to be braided right now and I hate that; my legs are the same. Woof.

I know this blog doesn't make any sense and probably never does...but whatever. I get to see Sof tomorrow and I can't wait!

Hope everyone else is done Christmas shopping, not worried about grades and isn't on their period. Today is gonna be a good day. Meow

Kitties are like kids: part 2

I like giving people gifts. I also like buying my cats toys. Not really because they love them, but because it makes me feel good. 

You know when you give a baby a present and you think they will love it? And then they end up playing with the box that the toy came in and not the gift itself? Damn, right? 

Well today when I got home from work I was getting ready for bed and noticed a tampon wrapper on the bathroom floor. I kicked it and Calv came running and then played with it for a good 10 minutes before I threw it away. Weird, but okay.

Then when I woke up from my nap, I noticed he has found it and was playing with it again. Who knew I didn't need to spend 3 dollars on Christmas presents for Calv- all he needs is a tampon wrapper. Sweet! I will be returning his gift tomorrow. Tampon wrappers will be saved from now on and my kitty will be happy. 

Kids and kitties are so cool, right?

Kitty children

I love my cat(s). Yes, I do love them both. I love Calv more than anything, though. And here's how I know how:

Exhibit A: Calv walks into the bedroom, shits next to the litter box and then hops on my bed. I cuddle with him for ten minutes and then clean up his shit. And then cuddle some more.


I can imagine that being a parent to a real, human kid would be similar to how I love Calv. Yes... I am angry he shit on my floor, but I still love him. Yes, it's disgusting and I don't want to clean up shit...but sometimes you just do what you gotta do.

Don't judge me.

I told Joey I was going to bring Calv up to my parents house for Christmas Eve. His response? "You will stress mom out!!"

I guess no cats on Christmas Eve for me! :)

I woke up this morning at about 4am, dying of heat. I live in an old house that is converted into 3 small apartments; my neighbors downstairs have control of the furnace (well, we all do  because it's in the laundry room...but they take control). It was 85 degrees in my house and that was with my windows open. If it was my choice, I would leave the heat below 70 degrees and wear warmer clothes if I was cold. Turns out, I don't get to decide on this one so I woke up and started studying. As I was taking a break on good ol' Facebook, my little bro posted a picture of himself and said that he was staying home sick. I called and arranged to spend the day with him.

This is a win-win situation. I got to leave my hot-as-hell-house to come to my parents cold house (my mom likes it cold) and hang out with a cool dude while I study. Today is a good day.

I have one more paper to write, 4 exams and then I'm done for the semester. I can't wait would be an understatement.

Today I'm grateful for:

• my fam
• Sof
• M&M's (Joey and I are currently eating all of the Christmas supply of them)
• Netflix (for entertaining Joey while I "study")
• my baby sis 
• Ape
• Ice water
• Cuties
• Showers and warm water
• basketball clothes

I asked Joey if he wanted a drink and then told him he could have water, milk, or orange juice. He graciously informed me that juice makes him poop. Great, we'll go with the milk. ha 

I decorated for Christmas with Joey at my house today- and by that i mean we taped one strand of lights in my front window and taped a "Happy Holiday's" sign to my front door. ha But at least now my neighbors think I'm festive.

I also have a "photo shoot" for Calv and Gretch. I'm sending out Christmas cards. Watch out.

Today sucked overall, but I'm hoping that between school and work things will be better by next Friday.

I'm ready for a break and hopefully a trip to SLC to see friends. I need a break!

good intentions

Today when I got to work I was feeling refreshed and ready to get shit done. I normally get to work, do the shit I absolutely have to do and then do homework. Tonight I decided I would go above and beyond and work as hard as I could.

Well, I did. And I got lots of shit done. As I was in the cooler trying to put away the Pepsi order (because the Pepsi drivers suck and don't put it away)- I dropped a liter of Pepsi in the cooler and it exploded. So then I had to mop the cooler and move everything I had just put away. I guess sometimes it's better just to sit back and do my homework.

On a positive note, I was talking to a staff member at Horizon House (who I also have a class with) and telling him how frustrated I am with not being able to do an MSW. He told me that he thinks I should try and do it anyway. Sometimes it's nice to have someone who thinks I can do what I want to do; I still don't know what I will do or if I can even get into an MSW program...but I guess it won't hurt to try. :)

Today I'm grateful for mops, Monsters, Cuties (Mandarin oranges), and Calv. Meow.

Attitude Adjustment or something.

Obviously from the last couple of posts, I have been a little upset. And to say a little upset would be a lie- I've been so angry for the last couple of days that it was starting to really bring me down. I'm still upset. I still wish that my DUI wasn't affecting my life the way it is right now. I still want to get my MSW.

But...

Today I met with my academic adviser (who also happens to be awesome!) and talked about all my options. She advised that I stay at SUU and do my masters in Public Administration. I had already thought about this option and think that it could be great- but it's not exactly what I wanted. I guess that's the great part about life...you never know what will happen.

I would loveeee to do my MSW at UNLV. I have been wanting to do this for years now and I didn't think that having a DUI would play any major role in my decision making process. Turns out, after talking to many people, it does. Sure, I can get into an MSW program without any major consequences of having a DUI but to get licensed after the program is another story. People have done it and maybe it would work out for me, too. But it's not a risk that I am able to financially make at this point. I can't afford to pay upwards of $40,000 to possibly get licensed. I need something that I will be able to rely on and survive on- and that seems to be a different route than what I intended.

In 2020 I will be eligible to get my DUI expunged from my record. At that point, if I feel like I need to get my MSW, I will. For now, I think I'll just roll with the punches and take a slightly different, not better or worse, path. And I'm okay with that.

I still wouldn't trade getting a DUI for anything. I don't think I would even be in school to care about getting an MSW if I didn't experience everything I have up to this point. So, although it's not ideal, I'll take the DUI and work with it. I am a firm believer that everything will work out; it might not be how I think it should be, but it will be good and I can be successful.

One weeks left of school! Wahooo!

Rant.

Did you know that it takes longer for a misdemeanor DUI to be expunged than it does a felony? 7 years for a felony and 10 years for a DUI. 

Did you know that in some states you can have a felony and still be a licensed social worker but you can't have a DUI? 

Looks like I should I have done coke. Or meth. Or heroin. My bad...

Weird

Sometimes life is weird as shit. Today was one of those days.

I found out that I can indeed graduate early, but only if I take 3 classes in the summer. Not bad, except I don't have money to pay for them. So I guess we'll have to see about that.

Just in case I DO get to graduate in the summer, I started applying for grad schools today. I hadn't really thought much about it (I have thought a lot about it, but nothing specific)...and then the question that got me was "do you have an charges aside from minor traffic tickets?" came up. I do, indeed, have a DUI and other alcohol related charges and for some reason I had just assumed it wouldn't even matter at this point. Turns out, it does and I will have to ask the Board of Social Work in whatever state I go to school/plan to work, if I can get my license. The only problem is that they won't tell me until AFTER I finish my MSW program.

So now I'm left wondering if it's worth 2 years- time and money, to MAYBE get my license. I really hope that someone will have more clear answers for me or some advice. I am meeting with my adviser at SUU on Thursday and I have been emailing some professors at potential schools but I just feel so defeated.

I know it'll all work out but it's frustrating right now because I have no idea what I should be doing. Wish me luck! :)

Lucky Charms and Monster

My diet the past 3 days has consisted of ice water, Lucky Charms, and blue Monster energy drinks. It's not all it's cracked up to be and I'm feeling a little bit cracked. The good news, however, is that finals happen in one week! I don't know how to describe how happy I am or the amount of relief I will feel when it's over. My first semester back has been a good one...but one that won't be missed.

Good thing Lucky Charms were invented, though. Seriously, I can't think of a more unhealthy food to eat, especially for breakfast- and then add it in for lunch, dinner and snacks, too. Maybe when I graduate college I'll prepare real human food, but for now, I kinda like it.

Sometimes I want to punch people in the face.

Seriously, though. I am usually a pretty nice person and I don't usually want to punch anyone...especially not in the face. But there are instances in which I want nothing more than to do so...here are a few:

• People in class who ask the same questions over and over. Seriously, you don't look smarter for the professor when you do that...you look stupid. And you're annoying. Stop it. 
• People who cheat on their significant other. I don't care why or how- I just want to punch you. And, in all reality, I have indeed punched one or two peeps for my friends... and I'm not afraid to do it again. It might be a slightly more awkward doing so sober, but I will. Trust me.
• The week before finals week. Because if I could punch this week, I would. 
• My head cold. I don't actually want to punch myself in the head...but if it would get rid of whatever nasty cold I have, I would. 

I feel a little better. 

Monday's come so soon.

Monday already? Wowza. I had a nice Thanksgiving break- minus feeling like I was gonna die for half of it due to a stupid head cold. Thank goodness Taunya was so sweet and came in super early for me on Sunday morning so I could go sleep.

Other than that, I have just been rearranging my schedule for school a million times. I think I have it how I want it- and then I change it again. I think it's getting close to how it'll be next semester and I'm excited. As of right now, I will be taking:

• Sociology of Drugs
• Global Issues in Sociology 
• Quantitative Reasoning (Math) 
• Organizational Communication 
• Family Processes and Theory
• Community Proposal

I'm pretty excited for all most of my classes. I can't say I'm thrilled to take math or the 2nd class of University 1000. But whatever. That's life. 

I mostly picked my classes based upon the time of the class. I will be done with school Monday-Friday by noon everyday. I am more than excited to try and have a "normal" sleep schedule that will not include a 3 hour nap, class, 2 hour nap, another class, etc. I am hoping that I will be able to work 11pm-7:30am, go to class from 8am-noon, and then sleep from about noon-7 or 8pm each night. That way I'll still have a semblance of a social life from 8-11pm. ha ha

Thanksgiving

I really love Thanksgiving. Last year I got to spend my Thanksgiving at the community Thanksgiving dinner- it was just what I needed and I'm so grateful for it.


This year I decided that I would help out with the community dinner but that I wanted to have some friends over to my house for a little dinner, too. I woke up early and started cooking the turkey. I never knew how disgusting pulling guts out of the turkey can be- and then I had a little hissing match with Calv because he wanted to eat the whole thing raw. I compromised and boiled the neck for him. He loved it.

I only stayed at the community dinner for a little while and then went home to finish cooking. Sof is here and has been sick- so she was in bed most of the day. Marin came over early to help me finish cooking and then Brittni and Adam joined us (with lots of delicious food they baked).

I am so grateful that even though I wasn't able (logistically) to spend Thanksgiving with my family, I have such wonderful friends that I was able to enjoy the holiday with and test out my turkey baking skills. Turns out, doesn't take much...or I lucked out...or perhaps I'm the only one who didn't hate it. ha. Either way, it was a really wonderful day.

Plus, I got to have pre-game lunch with the bestie.

Today I'm grateful for friends who have become family. I'm also grateful for my real fam. This morning my dad helped me get stuff ready to take to the community dinner.

Things work out.

I don't know why I do this to myself. I always worry, stress out and freak out because I don't think things will work out. And so far, they always have. Somewhere deep in my pea-sized brain, even during a freak out, I know that everything will work out and yet I still make myself sick over everything.
Some of it is a good thing, though. For example: my social theory paper that I was stressing about writing only took me an hour to write. Usually they take me at least 4 hours to research, read all the shit and then write-- so the hour was a breeze. I have no idea if I even wrote about what was being talked about, but I feel better that it's done.
Now I'm on to stressing about job interviews, more homework, a group project, math, no sleep, Thanksgiving dinner, etc.

I just need to keep reminding myself that if I put in the work, everything will work out. It might not be how I want it or how I think it should be...but it does work out.

Since I've been crabby lately, I'm going to make a happy list:

• I get to see Sof this week!
• We are having Thanksgiving dinner with Britt face and Adam 
• I get a break from school- the actual school part, not the homework. I'll take what I can get.
• SUU Basketball on Wednesday with my homies (Joey and Enna)
• My bills are paid. For now. I love feeling a little bit caught up. 
• Calv has been so cuddly and cute lately. I love him so much. 
• Today (Monday) is going to be a long day but I always feel so good after it's all over. 
• I'm super happy that I will have time to clean my house on Wednesday. It needs it. And I always feel 100 times better about life when the house is clean. 
• I will (hopefully) get to see my family this week at some point. All of my moms fam will be here. We'll see how that goes...

Anyway, I really do feel much better about life right now than I did last night. Today is gonna be a long ass day but then I get to sleep tonight and somehow that makes things better. I hope everyone has a very happy Thanksgiving!

This weekend has been the weekend of death. I want to drop out of school, run away, and sleep forever. Seriously. F*#* math. I hate it so much and it obviously hates me, too. And social theory can kiss my ass.

The only class I feel good about right now is Social Psych and it's not even that good. I don't know how I ever passed a class drunk if I can't even pass the damn thing sober. Blah.


Anyway, it's almost Thanksgiving. yay

So tired.

Lately I just feel like I can't sleep enough. Luckily, I work tonight and have school tomorrow and then I don't have to work on Friday night. I plan to use my time sleeping and cuddling with Calv. I'm just so tired. All the time. No matter how much sleep I get.

On other news, there isn't any. School and work are just kicking my ass- that's it.

I AM excited for Thanksgiving though! :)

And here we go again.

I just wanna stay in bed all day.

On second thought...

After re-reading my last blog post, I realize I sound like an ungrateful bitch....which, perhaps I am.

I guess mostly what I am learning is that life happens. People get sick, sleep doesn't have an on and an off switch, cats shit in a box and can't clean it out themselves, dishes don't do themselves, homework can be tedious and quite time consuming, and people are self-centered.

I am self-centered. The world definitely revolved around me and if it doesn't, I get upset. Isn't that like 2-year-old mentality? I think so. And yet, I still find myself getting upset over petty things that don't go my way.

I am usually too tired to hang out with friends, I never make it to family dinner at my parents house, my house is rarely spotless (if ever), I am horrible at math, I never call my sponsor or do step work, I haven't been to AA in weeks and I suck at math. And yet, I still have all these wonderful people who care about and love me.

This week, I'm going to try to "go with the flow" and just enjoy the moment. I get so caught up in trying to make everything go how I want it to go and then it never does...and even if what actually happened turns out to be great, I'm too busy being upset that it wasn't how I planned it.

Someone wise (who I won't name) would tell me to make a gratitude list, so I will:

• I'm grateful that I have litter boxes. My house would be even more of a nightmare without them...plus, that means I have kitties. 
• I'm grateful I got to sleep yesterday...even if it wasn't at my planned time or amount. 
• I'm grateful that I get to go watch basketball later today with my bestie and my GF. 
• I'm grateful that even though it's cold as %#%# outside right now, it's warm inside the truck stop. 
• I'm grateful that Sof is here for a few days- even if I am a bitch. ha 
• I'm grateful for schoolwork- I can't remember what I did all night at work before I was in school. Man, it sure makes the nights fly by. 
• I'm grateful for my school schedule next semester! I'm taking classes that I think I'll really enjoy- except math. 
• I'm grateful for technology. Even though I think it's a little overboard sometimes- I'm glad I can text my sis and Sof  (who don't live here) anytime. That's neat.

Okay, I'm still not feelin' it but maybe tomorrow will be better. Meow

expectations

As I was getting off work at 7:30am this morning, I was pumped for the day. Today was going to be perfect.

I ran to the store to pick up some groceries before I had school at 9am. Class went well and I enjoyed the discussion. I suppose this only added to my delusional thinking that it would be a good idea to plan my day. I know from a million past experiences that when I plan things, I also set expectations...and when I have expectations, shit goes crazy. And then I do.

Anyway, as I walked into my cat infested, messy as shit house, I soon realized that today might not be exactly how I planned it-- but figured it could be close. I got into my pajamas, tried to sleep for a minute and couldn't fall asleep, so I decided I'd make lunch before my 1pm class instead of after. My GF is here visiting and I thought it'd be fun to actually be able to sit and enjoy lunch together. I woke her up and told her I was making lunch- she said she wasn't hungry and that she didn't feel well.

Damn. I had already started cooking bacon and slicing vegetables, so I decided to continue anyway. I ate lunch alone and tried to take a quick nap before school. When my alarm went off at 12:40 I didn't want to move. Sof convinced me to get up and go- and that was probably the best part of my day. I hate it when I miss school because I'm tired.

After math I came home expecting that my cats magically cleaned their litter boxes and that my house wouldn't smell like shit. That didn't happen, but the dishes were done (thanks Sof).

I planned to sleep after math for a few hours and then wake up and spend time with Sof. Turns out, I slept until I had to get ready for work.

So, instead of a lunch-date and fun-filled evening, I ate alone and slept all day. And now I'm back at work (planning tomorrow).

The funny thing is, I really have been planning tomorrow. You know, when I will sleep and for how long (yeah right....that shit never happens how I plan it), who I'm going to spend time with and at what time, when I will shower, etc. I'm not sure why I repeatedly do this or if it's just a necessary evil: plan things even though you know it won't go the way you want it to go, because if you don't plan at all nothing will get done? I'm not sure.

All I know is that tomorrow can kiss my ass. I'm sleeping all day.

Even though...

Even though I didn't want to come to work tonight, I'm grateful for a job.
Even though pb&j isn't the most glamorous meal in the world, I'm grateful I have food to eat.
Even though my house is tiny and only has outlets in weird places, I'm so grateful it's mine.
Even though my cats pee on everything and make my house a disaster, I'm grateful for them.
Even though I don't get to hang out with my friends as much as I'd like to, I'm grateful that they are always here for me and that they are my friends.
Even though school is kicking my ass, I'm so grateful to be learning and (hopefully) almost done with my Bachelors degree.
Even though I hate math, I'm grateful that my math professor is so rad and that I'm actually learning it this time around.
Even though social theory isn't my cup of tea, I'm grateful that I am going to pass it this semester and I'll never have to take it again. Ever.
Even though psychology isn't my major, I'm grateful that I get to take lots of psych classes (mostly because there is a serious lack of sociology classes offered at SUU).

Even though I have no idea why I'm writing this, I am.

Hope everyone has a good weekend!

Election Day: Over

Finally, the elections are over and the Facebook nonsense can end. I mean, I'm sure it'll only get worse (the Facebook shit) before it gets better...but at least we're on the upward spiral now. Don't get me wrong, I think it's great and wonderful that we live in such a diverse country and that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. And even though I do not support Romney (for very obvious reasons), I can understand why some people do support him. And I can even respect some people who voted for Mitt. The thing I can't understand are the women who voted for Mitt--and especially the women who USE government assistance. I mean, really? Come on, people. Get real. Also, what's with gay folk who support someone who so openly discriminates against them? I will never understand. Ever.


But that's okay, because now I don't have to worry. Obama it is!

Now that that's over I feel much better. Peace out, homies.

Today I'm grateful for my baby sis. Even though we don't live in the same city or talk every day, I know I can always count on her. She's been one of my best friends throughout my life- even through the fighting and biting, and I'm so grateful that she's my sister. 

I could go on for days about all the things that Anne has done for me. 

Thanks for being the best sister in the world, honey. Meowwww. 

day 4: grateful

Today I'm grateful for my girlfriend, Sof. She is seriously one of the best people I know and I feel so lucky to have her in my life. Although I don't get to see her as often as I'd like, and I'm usually emo/tired when I do see her, I'm so grateful for her.

Just tonight I decided I would take a little nap before work. At about 10:40pm Sof called and reminded me to wake up so I wasn't late for work (I was planning to be up at 10pm...). I was still late for work, but if she hadn't called I would still be sleeping.

I'm grateful to be in a normal relationship- you know, one that you care about each other. It's been a while since that happened; it's refreshing.

I got to meet Sof's friends last week and it was lots of fun. I'm excited for her to meet my friends and family (hopefully), too! :)

Oh! And she lets me be a cat lady; she even likes my cats (or pretends to like them and I'm fine with that). Meow.

Gratefulllllllllllll

Today I'm grateful for being back in school. Seriously, I never thought that I'd get to go back since I screwed it up so many times. The entire first year that I was sober I thought I was doomed to a life working at the truck stop, making minimum wage and barely having  enough money to buy cat food and top ramen.

I mean, it's not like I'm rolling in the dough now and it's still been a challenge to be able to work full-time at the truck stop while going to school- I couldn't be more grateful for it.

I am also grateful that my studying is starting to pay off! My grade in social psych just went up from a B- to an A, my math grade is an A, social theory is an A and the class I hate more than anything is a B. I can handle that. Life is good. School is a lot of work but it's good and I'm grateful for it.

Grateful: day 2

I am grateful for my parents today.

My dad is the most kind person I have ever met- he would do anything for anyone. I always remember growing up my dad would be the first to invite random people over for dinner, taking Christmas to families who wouldn't have it otherwise, working multiple jobs to support our family, and coming to all of my events in school and sports no matter how far away they were or what time of day.

My mom and I have had our differences but lately (since I've been sober but especially the past couple of months) it seems like we are able to get along. She is always giving me food, toilet paper, and inviting me over for dinner. My mom is Joey's biggest fan and to me, that makes her golden in my book because who doesn't love good ol' Joe?

The best part is that I know no matter what, my parents love me. They might not agree with everything I do or believe, but at the end of the day I know they will always be there for me and love me. Couldn't ask for anything more.

No Shave November

No shave November. My favorite time of the year. I don't love November for the "no shave" part because I really like shaving, but I love nearly everything else about it.

I love crisp mornings walking to school after a long night at work. It seems to wake me up and helps me feel refreshed. 

I love that I can wear jackets and hoodies. I need to stock up this year. I am running low in that department. 

I love that basketball officially starts in November. So excited to spend my nights at the SUU games with my homies. Aka, April and Joey. 

I love Thanksgiving! I especially love the free Thanksgiving Dinner- this is our 2nd annual dinner and I'm so happy about it. It was so much fun last year and I'm grateful that I get to help do it again. 

I love opening my windows and getting under a few blankets and cuddling with Calv. It's perfect. Now if only I had Sof here, too. :) 

November is going to be great. I can feel it. 

November 1st

I am going to try and update my blog every day with some gratitude for my favorite holiday- Thanksgiving!

Last night I was being a little emo (and by a little, I mean I was extremely emo) and as I was driving home someone sent me some slightly rude messages. Since I was already upset, I didn't respond because I didn't want to be rude back. Today I was still feeling crazy, so I called my friend Mitch and cried to him and he just listened and told me not to worry. Normally, I'm not one to cry to people...and especially not a dude, but Mitch it seriously the best guy. I also got some cute texts and calls from other people who care about me and it really turned into a great day.

So today, I'm grateful that even when I'm being crazy/emo, I have friends who are always here for me and who care about me.