Sometimes I wish I could go back to the carefree, fun times.
Then I remember times like this:
Being a kid was fun; I 'd go back any day, for one day. I just never, ever, ever wanna go back to middle school or high school. I was (and I guess still am) painfully awkward. Ah, the joys of being an awkward pre-pubescent middle school girl.
*Oh, and by the way, middle school really wasn't that "painful" for me. I just like being dramatic about my life. :]
I just received an e-mail with the subject line: "how to get him 'addicted' to you".
Did I read it? No. Can I imagine what it said? Yes.
Have boobs, get fake ones, or stuff your bra.
2. Flirt. A lot. Be as cheesy as human possible.
3. Cook. Men (people) love food. Dessert is where you can really score bonus points.
4. Clean. The. Shit. Outta. Everything. All. The. Time.
5. Never look like you're been cleaning, cooking, or anything else that would be seen as "dirty". Always, always, always look like a super-model. Sweats are a no-no.
6. Be yourself. (hahahhahahhahaha)
And by that, I mean don't be yourself at all. Be fake. Always put on a smile, even if you want to cry. Never, ever leave the house without a 6inch coat of makeup on. Laugh at him even when he's so not funny.
7. Get a new dude who doesn't need to be "obsessed" or addicted with you in order to love you. Honestly, wouldn't it be a little creepy if you wanted him to be obsessed with you in the first place??
Oh, and did I mention that if you have boobs he'll love you no matter what??! Get fake ones if you don't have them already. It's the hottest new thing to do.
Since boycotting fast food due to the ridiculousness of the outfits the employees are required to wear, I decided to take up cooking. Yeah right...
I did, however, decide that I should start eating out less and cooking at home more. Today was day one of this glorious adventure. I made Coconut Shrimp, stir-fry veggies, and rice. BAM!
Earlier today I decided to eat at In & Out Burger. Yummy.
Then I noticed the ridiculous uniforms that the employees are required to wear. Why??? I mean, I can understand the point of having uniforms and sometimes they even look nice. What I do not understand is why on earth someone who is opening a business would purposefully choose for their employees to look so ridiculous.
After thinking long and hard I came up with some possible arguments:
The owners are ugly and want their employees to be on their level...or below.
They want customers to find pleasure in seeing these poor employees dressed like clowns.
The owners actually think the uniforms are flattering and look decent.
I, for one, think it's very degrading and unnecessary for employees who work at fast food chains and otherwise to wear hideous uniforms that provide nothing extra that regular clothes couldn't.
Excuse me while I go write letters to owners of all fast food chains to complain about how they are all assholes and bitter. Included in the letter I'll request that employees have uniforms that look more like this:
Well hey there, folks! It's Jill and Joey to the rescue today. Top Ten reason I love Joey this week: 1. he is buff 2. he shaved his head. sexy little guy. 3. he has non-pleated jeans now. yay. 4. he acts like a cat. on command. 5. he a self-proclaimed "electronics man". his collection includes: 3 ipods, a cell phone, and multiple chargers...which he has pics of on his phone.
6. he brags about being spoiled. 7. he watches the biggest loser while eating ice cream. 8. he can sing/dance like no one else i know. 9. his smile makes my day better. 10. he's the best bro in the world. duh.
We decided to take a million pics with Enna's (our sis) camera. Sucka!
Here we are:
Hope your weekend is stellar!
P.S. hope your spring break ROCKS! we'll be partying like rock stars for sure! pics sure to come.
For those who don't know me, I'll soon be 25 years old. In fact, I'll be a quarter of a century old in exactly 177 short days. EEK!
Okay, okay...for ya'll who are already to the big 2-5 mark and beyond, chillax. I don't think you're old if you're over 25. I'm just a freakin' out a little bit because I always thought that by 25 I'd have a completely different life than I do right now. Ever since I was little I always thought that by 25 I'd "have it all" : sexy husband, white picket fenced in house, little dog in the backyard, 8 (effing) kids, and the president of the young women's.
Honestly, I've never had, and will never have any of those things...at least not in the way I had planned for so many years. And I'm perfectly okay with it. Sure, sometimes I wonder how much different or "easy" might life could be if I did choose my childhood path and it almost seems worth it. Then I snap back to reality and I remember that I'd end up in a mental institution if this : sexy husband, white picket fenced in house, little dog in the backyard, 8 kids, and the president of the young women's, was my life.
I don't want a husband. I could settle for a studio apartment in a larger city. A dog, sure, why not? 8 kids, dream on. Church? No thanks.
Yes, I'm freaking out that I'm turning 25 because I have absolutely no idea where my life is going and where I'll end up next...but I guess that's also what I love about my life so much. I have nothing tying me down or holding me in one spot. I am free to blow with the wind; I hope I never get tied down.
Naturally, I don't want to end up alone and I don't intend to do so. I just don't want the same things I always thought I'd want. Sometimes it's confusing to try and break out of the mold that was made for me and what I wanted for so long; sometimes I don't know if I'm making the right choices.
Confused as I may be, I do know one thing, I know that no matter what I do I'll always have my family and friends and what more could a girl ask for? So to all of you who get to deal with my "quarter-life crisis" freak out sessions, just know that I love you. And until I'm done freaking out and deciding what to do next, sorry I'm a little bitch. xoxo
So here's to making the big 2-5 the best it can be! I can't wait to see what life hands me next! Bring it on! (and trust me, I know I have a while until my birthday)...but just in case you want gift ideas, here ya go:
If you haven't noticed by now, I have an obsession with Irish pubs. I don't know why because I'm not Irish, I don't drink beer, and I have never been to Ireland. Even still though, I love pubs. There is something about them that automatically makes me feel happy and at home.
I love walking into a dim pub. The smells, the sounds, the people: I love it all.
I LOVE IRISH PUBS! Maybe I'll open one in Cedar City....right....
I saw Alice in Wonderland yesterday. Meh, didn't love it...
I got to see Tegan and Sara at the House of Blues in Vegas on Tuesday. Heavenly. And I remember it this time (unlike the first time I got to see them play).
Joey shaved his head. What a goofball. Love it.
Happy Birthday to my other bro, Buddy. He's 23 today. Weird...
School is royally kicking my ass. Still.
I get to see some friends I haven't seen in weeks tonight. Yay.
I'm in love with Tegan and Sara. Both of them. They are awesome.
I ate at an Irish Pub in Las Vegas. I <3 Irish Pubs more than I love most things in life. Creepy? Maybe...
Some lyrics I love: (thanks to baby girl Jenny Lewis for this song)
It’s not as if New York City burnt down to the ground
Once you drove away
It’s not as if the sun won’t shine
When clouds up above
Wash the blues away
Are we breakin' up?
(Breakin up)
Are we breakin' up?
(Breakin' up)
Is there trouble between you and I?
Did my heart break enough?
(Break enough)
Did it Break enough this time
(Break enough)
Here’s to all the pretty words we will never speak
Here’s to all the pretty girls you're gonna meet
Am I breakin up?
(Breakin up)
Am I Breakin up
Is there trouble on the line?
Did your heart break enough?
(Break enough)
Did it Break enough this time
(Break enough)
Ooooh, it feels good to be free
Oooh it feels good to be free
Oooh it feels good to be free
Betrayal is a thorny crown
You wear it well
Just like a king
Revenge is the saddest thing
Honey, I’m afraid to say
You deserve everything
Am I breakin up?
(Breakin up)
Are we breakin up?
Is there trouble between the lines?
Did your heart break enough?
(Break enough)
Did it break enough?
(Break enough)
Break enough this time?
Ooooh, it feels good to be free
Oooh it feels good to be free
Oooh it feels good to be free
On a different note, I think I'm gonna move to sunny St. George for the summer. I mean nothing is set in stone and I don't have a job or a place to live down there, but I would like to do it. I need a change of pace and some new faces; St. George is close enough to come home if needed and far enough away that I can meet some new friends.
Okay, not really. I'll write my paper in a few minutes, but first I just want to tell you how much I love homework.
Lets back up for a minute. I suck at school. I hate waking up to go to class, I hate unnecessary homework, and I hate boring lectures. I love learning and I'm pretty sure I'm at least semi-smart; I just prefer to do it on my own. I know, I know...I should do online school, blah blah blah. No. I will finish my undergraduate degree at SUU if it kills me and thus I am up at 1:15 am blogging about how much I love school instead of writing a paper on guy that I can't pronounce his name.
I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school. I love school.
If you don't know my sister, you're missing out...so I'll just tell you about her. Anne is one of the very best people on earth, hands down. I think I totally lucked out in the sibling department because I got Anne and Joey and I'm pretty sure they're both perfect. Buddy is pretty rad, too.
Anyway, Enna has been serving a mission for the LDS church since October in the Naga mission. She has loved every second of it, including the rats in her shower bucket, the fact that she has a bucket "shower", spiders bigger than her head, and an array of what I would consider awful food. Anne is amazing and has an outlook on life that is unlike anyone else I know.
Since arriving in the Philippines Anne has had some health problems that have been persistent. Being the little go-getter that she is just let them slide by and hoped that they would eventually go away. Three months have gone by and she is in a great deal of pain and the doctors cannot find anything. My guess is because the "hospital" is more like a grass hut...go figure. We were able to Skype with her this morning and she is still very positive, although her mission president said it's hard for her to get out of bed.
Enna will be flying home and hopefully arriving on Tuesday night to the Salt Lake City airport. As much as I am dying to see her, my heart is breaking for her. I don't think she's ever been as happy as she is right now in her entire life. She loves the Philippines, the people, and everything she has been doing. It's hard for me to watch her have to leave something that she loves because of something out of her control; I wish there was something that I could do for her. Even though this will be a huge challenge for Anne I know that she will take whatever comes her way with a positive outlook.
Joey and I have never been more excited in our lives to do the Decker Butt Dance with our sister. We just hope she gets well soon so that she can return to normal and go back on her mission. For now, we'll enjoy every second we get to spend with her! We love you Enna Bear!
“ no matter how upside down it all may temporarily appear, we will have no fear because we know this secret: life is crazily in love with us—wildly and innocently in love with us. the universe always gives us exactly what we need, exactly when we need it. ”rob brezny
Pray for my sister (if you pray), otherwise think happy-get-well-thoughts or something for her. She's sick and in the middle of nowhere on her mission. I would love for her to be able to stay out there because, lets be real, she's the happiest little mofo in the world right now.
Pray, hope, think, meditate, or whatever else ya'll do, for my baby sis.
Oh hell. What have I gotten myself into this time you ask?
Well, I placed my order for some HGC drops today with Anna and Jaime. We're gonna see what happens. And I might be a little bitchy for about a month. No more candy and coke for me! Ah, shiz!
I am deciding to love my life right now even if it's not exactly what I'd choose if I could. School isn't so bad, my fam is rad, I have the coolest friends in Utah, and I'm going to the Tegan and Sara concert in two weeks. My life in little old Cedar City could be terrible but for the most part, I really do like it.
I mean, if I had the opportunity to leave tomorrow (and have my degree completed), I'd hop on the plane/bus/car/boat/any form of transportation in a heartbeat. I've been itching to get outta here for so long it almost seems like a dream. A bad dream. As much as I truly do love Cedar and all my friends and family that are here, it's not for me. I need something else. I want something different.
Earlier today my friend said she's gonna hop on a plane and move to Texas to runaway from and solve problems. Though I am guilty of doing exactly that a number of times (not quite as drastic moves geographically, but for the same reasons), I don't feel like that's why I want to leave this time. I mean sure, some part of my is probably trying to runaway from something or someone from my past. For the most part though, I think I'm just finally ready to break free from all that is expected of me here in Utah, in my parents basement, from everyone who knows me.
Leaving Cedar isn't going to solve my problems, make me into someone new, or adjust my outlook on life. Leaving Cedar will allow me to be who I am, make new friends, and have new adventures without me having to worry about offending those that are close to me. I'll always love Cedar and I have so many memories and friends here that I think I'll always call it home; I just need to have a "vacation" home as well. Sometimes living here is exhausting; I'm ready to relax and just be myself.
Now don't get me wrong, I don't feel like it is impossible to be myself right here, living in the 'rents basement--it's a choice that I'm making and have made for a long time. In order to respect my parents (family) beliefs it makes it difficult to be "myself". It's not like I'm fake right now, I'm just not doing what I'd be doing under different circumstances.
So here's to getting the hell done with school and getting the eff outta Utah...or at least out of my parents basement.
***this is not meant offensively to my parents. they are some of the coolest folks I know. love you M and D. :)
Hi I'm Jill and I'm a blog stalker...I love reading random blogs- but not just any random blogs....I like funny, cute, interesting kind of blogs. I'm not really a huge fan of the my-life-is-so-perfect kind of blogs.
I have a few blogs that I check every day hoping that they will be updated; it's disappointing when they aren't. Thing is, I'm getting bored. I need some new material, if you will. I need your help. Yes, you.
What is your favorite blog? Do tell.
Please and thank you (in advance). :) [creep smile for all of you]
For a while, Anna (co-worker) and I were writing poetry every day, all day. I mean seriously, we even started a poetry (unbeknownst to the owners of the gas station in which we work) contest for all the Depot cracks. We wrote poems for our bosses, co-workers, friends, family, and random people we met. Some people thought we were weird, some thought we might be on drugs, and some just thought it was normal. I still have no idea why we decided to become Depot poets, but it sure was good times. So tonight, as I sit here bored and alone, I am going to write some Depot poetry for all my blog stalkers.
Okay, I lied. I am not really going to do that because I can't think of anything except that I'm tired and I want to go to bed and never wake up. I mostly just wanted to document this very special time of my life that I've had at the Depot. Poetry Days have been some of the best lived here in Depot Land and I don't wanna forget about them!
Since it's Valentines Day today I thought I'd share with you my love of scrabble. I think I would marry it if I could, so it must be love, right? I don't remember when my love for scrabble began, but I know it was around age 4. My mom has always been an avid word person; she loves scrabble. I remember watching my parents play scrabble for hours on end. I was fascinated by the game and always wanted to play with them.
When I was around 9 years old, I met Lily (and Max) when they moved in across the street from us. They were in their 60's at that time, I think. Anyway, Lily also had a passion for words and was an excellent scrabble master. I would go to her house every Sunday and she would play with me, teach me new words, and show me strategies. Looking back on these times I can only imagine how frustrating that might have been for her. I mean, I was 9 years old and she was brilliant.
The older I got, the less appealing scrabble became. I didn't want to play Scrabble...I wanted to be cool. I don't think I played more than ten times my entire high school career. And then it happened. My boyfriend at the time left on his mission and I needed a hobby. My mom got out the Scrabble board and it's been history ever since. I love Scrabble. I love speed Scrabble, regular scrabble, any kind of Scrabble.
I love Scrabble so much that I want to dedicate an entire room to the cause if I ever get my own pad. I want a Scrabble table (Lily has an amazing one), clock, pictures, pillows, etc. Trust me, I have it all planned out. It will be awesome. And then maybe one day I'll play in a Scrab tourny. How RAD would that be?!
P.S. I have decided I want to start collecting Scrabble boards or anything to do with the game. So, if you're ever wondering what I want for my birthday (Sept. 4) or Christmas, you know what to get me!
In case you haven't heard (highly unlikely since I talk about it all the time) or have forgotten, check out my Jazzy Hoe blog at www.jazzyhoes.blogspot.com
Also, please e-mail me some Jazzy Hoe pics if you have any! We love getting new pictures; the more the better!!
I think I live a pretty awesome life and often wonder what it'd be like if it were made into a book. Here's a little sneak preview of what it might be like if I actually decided to take the time to write an autobiography (which at this point in time I have no intention of doing).
Title: How I Survived: Jill's Life in Utahville
Chapter 1: Being Born a Provo-ite: the ins and outs of Happy Valley
Chapter 2: Hating Church; being forced to participate.
Chapter 3: Finding A Husband: AKA, hellish ordeal
Chapter 4: Just Keep Drinking: A Guide To Being an Alcoholic
Chapter 5: Drinking: a continuation of the previous chapter
Chapter 6: Vegas is Only a Two Hour Drive Away: Thank God!
Chapter 7: Gag Me: I Do Not Like You.
Chapter 8: Well Hello There...I DO Like You.
Chapter 9: Wow, Utah Isn't So Bad...I Still Wanna Leave
Today I was having a convo with my little bro Joey. If you don't know Joey, you're missing out. Anyway, it went a little something like this: Me: Hey Joe Bear! Guess what?! You're almost 17! CRAZY! You're getting so big. I hate it.
Joey: Jill. I'm still in high school. I'm not old. Me: Well Joey, you're gonna be 18 in like a year! What the H!
Joey: Ha, I know! I can't wait. Me: Do you know how old I am?
Joey: hmmm...I forgot. Me: I'm 24. Gross. I'm gonna be 25 in September.
Joey: Ew, you're almost 30! You'll be a freak! Me: Joey, don't be mean! (pretending to cry)
Joey: Well...Jill, get real.
What the hell? My little brother thinks I'm old. Not just getting older, but old. Like old maid status. I think I'm gonna die. I mean, I know I'm gettin' to the "old maid" status in Utah world but that's not a problem for me. I can deal with that. What I can't deal with is the fact that I only have five years until I'm actually "old". EEK!
Good thing I love Joey...a lot. Otherwise he might have been punched in the face or something.
Valentines Day is a day of mixed emotions for a lot of people. Is it one of happiness and love or one of despair and hopelessness? Well, for me, it's one that I just don't really care about. I mean, yeah, I've had plenty of lovers and fun times on V-Day; I guess it's not terrible. I, for one, am a big supporter of showing your significant other that you love them. I just don't see the point of dedicating a day to buy them shit to prove that love. Here is a (small) list of my reasoning behind my take on the ol' V-Day:
I am the least romantic person I've ever met. Literally.
Roses don't make me think you love me.
Sick love notes on Hallmark cards with little to no thought put into them make me wanna barf.
A day dedicated to people who are "in love" so that they can express their love seems a little pathetic. I mean, can't you just be in love all the time and not have to have a specific day set aside to be mushy?
I don't have any plans; it's on a Sunday so there will be nothing going on in the thriving metropolis of Cedar City.
I don't think pink and red, alone, go well together. Make it a rainbow and it's much prettier, but plain pink and red are gaggy. I don't like it.
Doileys (if that's how to spell it) are disgusting and it seems people like them around V-Day. Why?!
Wearing underwear that say "I Love You" is one thing, but wearing full-on sex outfits with lips, hearts, and "kisses" on them is really weird. Just have sex, don't be a clown or something.
Chocolate is fine and I'll take it if you wanna give it to me, but my fat ass really doesn't need it. Thanks!
Love "coupons" make me wanna gag myselft with a fork nine times. I mean, honestly, I don't think that even my dirty mind could top what some of those "coupons" offer. It's one thing to do certain things spontaneously but it's a whole new level when you offer your "services" by way of coupons. Unless it says "make your bed for a week", "wash the dishes", or "clean the bathroom for a month" I don't want your damn coupons.
People waste a lot of money on not very delicious food. Pizza and a movie would be much better than some gross "fancy" dinner. If you could get on that right now, I'd really appreciate it.
I'd rather watch basketball in my bed alone than be on an awkward date with some dude I don't really like.
*this list is in no way meant offensively to those of you loving people who are in relationships and sometimes do really nasty things for love. i still love you and hope the very best for you and your significant other. just keep your hands to yourself when you're around me and we're good to go. i promise to do the same around you, cause trust me, you don't wanna see me gettin' it on.
I'm totally fried from fake tanning. Wait, before you judge me, hear me out. Last night I was having one of the most bitch-tastic nights of my life...as in I was being a bitch. My dear friend, Britt, and I decided to eat food and go tanning. Fake tanning. It was lightly snowing (actually I don't remember if it was really snowing or not, but it adds a little somethin' to the story), I was cold as hell (if hell is cold), and I needed me some sunlight. What better way to solve Bitch Fest 2010 than to fake bake? None I tell you.
Ah, as I basked in my "sunlit" tanning booth listening to 98.1 with Delila (soft rock, less talk) I thought about how incredibly awesome my life is right now. I mean, yeah...school is kicking my ass and making me want to dive off a cliff with sharp rocks at the bottom, but my life is pretty amazing. I live rent-free (but not parent-free), I get to do anything I want, anytime I want. I mean, it seems I'm always doing something crazy fun and I like my life.
Anyway, back to fake baking...as I was lying there jamming to some sick soft rock, I lost track of time. I told the front desk girl to set my bed for 20 minutes; I was thinking I'd get out sooner if I felt like I was gonna get crispy. Well, as my luck would have it, I stayed the entire 20 minutes. Now if you don't know me this might not be a big deal to you, but for those of you who have seen my pasty, white body you'd understand. One day later and I'm in a world of hurt. I look like a lobster, feel like little pins are stabbing my body and have the whitest ass on earth right now (yep, I left my undies on and thank the Lord for that)!
Anyway, it must not be too bad since I plan to go back very soon. I don't care how much it will increase my risk of getting skin cancer (already runs in the fam and I'm doomed anyhow), how fake it is, or how much it might hurt the day after. I love being warm and if fake tanning is how I'm going to accomplish this during Utah's freezing winters, then so be it! I love FAKE BAKING!
The Super Bowl was fun times. I cheered for the Saints and they won. yay. I even got myself a Saints Jersey; I have no idea who the dude is, but whateve!
I got to eat lobster dip at the rain forest cafe. yummmmmm!
I ate 20 chicken nuggets in about...ten minutes. um, gross right? So good though.
After 25 (almost) years of not using a wallet/purse, I have successfully used a wallet for over an entire month now!
YAY for me!
Okay, but seriously, what the eff is wrong with me? How come it took me so long to realize how annoying it is to lose my I.D., money, and license every time I need them? This past month has been a little slice of heaven, all thanks to Ed (that's my wallet). I mean, without Ed, I'd be lost...or at least all my stuff would be gone.
So, thanks Ed for keeping my stuff together for me. You're a life saver!
i'm pretty sure hacking up green snot and not being able to breathe in without my lungs collapsing is a bad sign. Guess we'll see what the doc says in the morning....
i have taken more sleeping pills and nyquil than is recommended for a 7 day period since 9am this morning; i'm still awake. thank you to my wonderful body that has such high resistence to drugs and alcohol. what would i do without you?
i can't fall asleep and i'm going to rip my hair out.
i hope i start my period soon because, lets just say i've been a bitch face for a few days. or a few weeks. shit.
i need to clean my room and bathroom like it ain't no thang. am i planning to do so anytime soon? no. does this irritate the hell out of me? yes, indeed.
school is kicking my ass. it's awesome....in a not so awesome way.
tomorrow is friday. yay.
3 basketball games on saturday = i hope i can stop coughing my lungs up by then. it's really not so great to watch basketball if all i do is hack my lungs up.
uhhhgg. Someone please bang my head on the concrete or run me over. I'm so sick of school; I can't handle it anymore. It seriously pisses me off to go on Tuesdays because I have class from 10am-5pm and I hate all of the classes, but especially the last one which goes from 2:30-5pm. What a waste of time and energy!
In good news, my Jr Jazzie's are doing well. Practice on Monday was fun and we learned lots; hopefully tonight will be good as well.
I'm not gonna lie, I went into hibernation mode last night at 6pm and now it's 8:15am and I just woke up. I took sleeping pills and nyquil to knock myself out; it worked wonders. Now I feel ready to take on the day!
(Imagine me batting my eyelashes, with music playing in the background and pink sparkles everywhere... and then continue reading with that image in your head the whole time.)
Today was a long day. And for the love of all that's good and holy, I have no idea why I am still awake. But here I am.
It all started Saturday at 1AM when my BFF and I got a brilliant idea to go sledding. Since we're probably the laziest people on earth (not really, but close), we decide to tie the sled to a rope which was attached to my car inside the trunk. We cruised each other around for an hour or so... Can we say HECKA fun?! By the way, it was a blizzard and I hate snow (if you didn't already catch that drift).
As I was driving home I got a picture message from Annie B. of her and her *choke* fiance (unofficially). Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy for Annie it's unreal, it just makes me miss her more. Anyway, she called me and we chatted about how I need to find a black dress by April 10th. I can't remember the last time I owned or wore a dress. This should be quite the adventure. I'm kind of excited about it at this point in the day. Earlier today I was having a mild anxiety attack about the whole ordeal, but it's growing on me. Hell, maybe I'll even like wearing the dress. Okay, lets not get too crazy..that'll never happen.
After I hung up the phone with Annie it was well after I should have been sleeping. I finally snuggled into my bed at around 4:30AM. Barf.
My phone started blaring "I Kissed a Girl" much too early to my liking and at 7:30AM I rolled my not-so-happy-ass outta bed and into the shower. Team pictures for my Jr Jazzies took place today and I had to be in the photo. Barf. Oh well. The best part of this section of my really lame but at the same time awesome day is that my 7th/8th graders won their game!!! YAY!
After the game I called my grandma to see how she was holding up; she seemed bored, so I went out to visit her. We went and played BINGO with the other residents and it made me realize how much I really do not want to get old. I guess I could always look forward to winning 25 cents a game at BINGO...now that's really somethin!
After a rousing game of BINGO and a nice chat with the G-rents I headed to the SUU women's bball game with my cousin. Not only did the girls win in double overtime, we scored some sweet SUU t-shirts. I love free t-shirts!
Then to top off my oh-so-freaking-cool-day I got the honors of closing the Depot from 7pm-11pm. And lets be real, I saw 6 people the entire time I was there and we made a whopping $300.00...my oh my, life is grand. And I lied...I didn't get to the Depot until 7:20pm because the damn girls kept going into overtime.
Now it's 1:05AM and I'm still awake. I'm tired as hell. I work 13 hours tomorrow and I have homework coming out every pore in my body. I need a vaca ASAP.
(Imagine the sparkles getting more intense and the music fading as my eyelashes disappear from the screen...)
Literally. I swear I'm so smart it hurts sometimes...and then days like yesterday happen.
I woke up early, showered, got ready, and was actually out the door by 8:40am. If you know me, you know that's a major feat. Usually being 20 minutes late to class is good for me. I planned to leave early because of the freaking 20 feet of snow we got the night before so that I could thaw my car, scrape the windows and find a decent parking space at school.
Anyway, so at 8:40 am I rushed out my door, forgot my backpack, ran back inside and grabbed it and started my car. Since it was a million degrees below zero, I decided to let my car do the work on getting the ice off my windshield so I wouldn't have to scrape it. I revved up my engine (about 20 times), sprayed it with ice melting stuff and waiting about five minutes. Then I tried to leave. Uh, why isn't my car moving?? I mean, I know I drive a tiny little car that isn't bigger than a 4-wheeler...but really?? It didn't budge. I tried again. And again...and again! For about ten minutes I sat there trying to get my car to move and it was just not working. Blah. I woke up early for this?! LAME!
So I called my dad (he saves me a lot). He said he'd come get me. In the meantime, I was STILL revving up my engine trying to get somewhere. I noticed my neighbor walking up to help me, so I rolled down my window and she told me to try reversing. Still nothing. WTF is wrong with my stupid car?!
And then I noticed the emergency brake was still on...oops.
I took it off and reversed (just to appease the neighbor) and sped away.
Moral of the story:
Sometimes on days like this it reminds me that I'm really not that smart and maybe I should be less of a bitch.Oh, and that I EFFING hate snow more than anything on earth...or at least pretty close to that.
Yes mom and dad, I still made it to class only one minute late. Be proud. xoxo
It seems I get the infamous "why aren't you married" line quite often these days. So here's to all you curious folk and the answers to why I am not married. First of all, let me make it perfectly clear that I am super happy for all of my married friends who have found happiness in doing so.
Now, lets get down and dirty.
People seem to equate love and marriage with beauty: "You're so pretty...how come you aren't married?" or "Wow, for such a beautiful girl it seems like it'd be easier to find a husband". Thanks for the compliments folks, but really? I think I'll start saying, "Wow, for such a plain person you sure found a looker to marry you!" or "Holy shit, I can't believe someone actually wanted to marry you with your snaggle tooth and pimple face. Congrats!".
The next thing people bring into my whole "marriage dilemma" is that I'm too liberal. Someone actually told me that if I would "just stop thinking so damn much maybe boys wouldn't feel so intimidated by me and would want to ask me on a date"...Um, really? No, thanks! Maybe it is just a phase (me being liberal), but I like it and I'm not going to change that so I can find a husband.
"If you were active in the church you'd be married by now for sure!"...huh? No I wouldn't. God has nothing to do with marriage. Sure, I might be in a singles ward filled with lots of potential mates but I'd also want to rip my hair or slice myself with a dull blade. So for now it's probably best if I don't do that.
I'm 24 years old people. I still have a long time to "find my eternal companion". I want to see the world, live in a trailer in Death Valley, make new friends, dye my hair pink (again), get a tattoo, live in Hawaii, and cure world hunger before I get married. Trust me, I'm not bored...I'm pretty sure that if you're worried about me finding a husband it's you who are bored. Get a hobby and leave me alone. Thanks and have a great day!
I would apologize for my last few posts since I've been pretty bitchy, but I'm not gonna lie I am just being honest. I guess I could just say that even if you fall under any of the past couple of posts (fbook on your big wedding day, can't spell, etc.), I probably still like you even if I pretend that I wouldn't.
And lets clear up something else: I'm really nice sometimes. I care about people and I love being with friends. Just have some common sense and we'll be okay.
5 Things I'm grateful for:
1. A healthy body that allows me to do so many things.
2. Friends and family who love me no matter what I do or think.
3. Sleep. I just love it. No reason.
4. School. I sure complain about it a lot for liking it so much. I should just suck it up and shut up about it.
5. A job. It's not glamorous but it's a job and those are hard to come by in Utah right now.
Lets get one more thing under control while we're at it..."lose" and "loose" mean completely different things and it's a little embarrassing when you mix them up.
Lost=lose
Not tight=loose
Can you think of any more annoying spelling errors I should be ranting about?
*And yes, I'm being serious when I say that these spelling errors might possibly be the most annoying thing on earth in my book.
Getting “their”, “they’re”, and "there"; “you’re” and “your”; "to", "too", and "two" mixed up might possibly be the sickest thing on earth. Literally.
If you don't know how to use these words correctly, don't use them. You look stupid and it annoys the hell out of me.
I'm pretty sure we learned the meanings and proper uses of these words by the time we were in second grade. Need a refresher? Check out these worksheets; if you have questions, do ask.
Ready...set...CHANGE YOUR STATUS TO MARRIED (30 seconds after gettin' hitched, preferably)!
Okay, so here we go. It really bothers me, dear friends, when you get married (yay! for you and that you found your "eternal companion") and then spend the whole day of and the week following your wedding on freaking FACEBOOK. We don't care what waterfall you saw today, go have sex or something. Don't update your status every 12 minutes letting us know you married the best dude in the world. I mean, I hope you're happy and all but lets just enjoy your time with your spouse and leave your computer out of it.
Below we see this romantic little devil updating his status during the wedding ceremony. Nothing says true love like letting all the other women on Fbook know he's taken now. Way to be on top of things dude!
While I do admit that I update my status like a mad-woman and I like it. A lot. I am not getting married, nor will I be getting married in the near future, if ever. I am not updating my status on the day that I give it up to someone for the first time, making eternal commitments to God and another human, or traveling the world on a romantic honeymoon. I'm just chillin' in Cedar, probably at work or school. You, my dear newly wed, should be doing something else rather than updating your effing status for the world to see.
Today my grandma fell and broke her hip. She's in surgery as I type this post. Luckily she's all cracked out on pain pills and I think she'll be fine.
Recently I've been thinking a lot about how much I do not want to get old; today only helped reconfirm my desire to die young. I think I'll drive my car off a cliff the day I begin to feel "old". Sounds good to me!
I totally forgot about my old blog until today and boy am I glad I kept it around in the archives. It's funny how similar I was two years ago without knowing or being okay with a lot of the things that consume my life currently. Although I wouldn't go as far as to say that I'm "on track", I know what I want and I know what I need to do in order to obtain it. Two years ago I was lost on multiple levels and it all makes sense. Hindsight is 20/20, right?
I'm just glad I didn't go along with the crowd on the things I was so confused over two years ago; while I will probably always struggle on some level with certain things, who doesn't? Had I gone along with what was "best for me" at that time and before that, I'd probably be married with two kids and one the way. Although that's great for some people, I would end up in a mental institution if I tried to be that person.
Maybe I'll end up in a mental institution regardless of what I choose to do with my life...but at least I won't be jacking up my kids by doing so.
No joke. I know I blogged them so I could always look them up, but really what's the point of making them if I can't remember them two weeks later. OOPS! Maybe I'll have to print them and tape them all over my bedroom walls...yes, I think I will.
I'm tired of coughing my lungs up. That should stop soon. Please and thank you. Lung god, if you're out there...please make this stop ASAP!
I <3 Obama. I have a t-shirt that says just that stapled to my wall...since 2008. Go big or go home.
I need water but I'm too lazy to get my happy ass out of bed to get some, so instead I'll just whine about being thirty on my blog.
SUU women's basketball team won their game on Monday by 1 point. It was a thriller for sure. Love it!
I have watched five basketball games thus far this week. And I plan to watch at least three more that I know about. This is a good thing in my life.
I cut Mya and Leila's hair. Surprisingly it looks pretty good! I wasn't too nervous with Mya because her hair is fine and easy to manage, but with Leila's hair being almost exactly like my crazy wanna-be black girl fro I got a little tense. The girls both liked the end results and so did their mom, so I guess it's all good!
I am not a fan of my research group. The end.
I got to see Britt this week and plan to see her again this weekend. Yay for friends.
The dentist said my teeth are perfect. No probs there. Woot!
I made a path to my bed so that I won't have to trip over all the shit on my floor. And by shit, I really mean junk...and by junk, I mostly mean clothes. I need to start being less of a slob or something. Until then, at least I can safely make it to my bed.
I'm going to the doctor tomorrow to cure my lungs of this evil disease...and maybe to see if he'll give me some crazy pills, too. Then I won't have to be so ADDish in school. We'll see how that goes. I'm crossing my fingers.
It's 2010 and I graduated high school in 2004, shouldn't I be effing done with college by now? Seriously, I could practically be a doctor by this time. FML! But really, I wouldn't trade my 25 year college plan for anything! It's been a long, very productive and life-changing journey thus far. Thanks M & D for letting me live in your basement all this time (with a few minor pauses).
Speaking of that, I'll be 25 this year. Creepy. I wanna be 15, not 25. So much to do, so little time...cause if you think about it, my life is more than 1/4 over even if I live to be crazy old...which I have NO intention of doing.
I have the best brother on earth. Joey is the best thing in my life every day and some days he is the only good thing. I love his guts.
I miss Enna; I'm super glad we get to g-chat and fbook it up still though. Only 16 more months, baby! xoxo
Don't be fake. It's annoying and everyone can see past your stupid masks. The end.
I want to move. I've never been content to stay in one place or do the same thing for long. I like change, I like new faces, new things. I gotta get out of here. Pray that I'll graduate in the next 112349 years so that I can get the hell out of Utah. I want something different! But I also want to be able to come to my parents basement sometimes...so, mom and dad please don't move! Love you.
I need sleeping pills apparently. My brain does not shut off and it is driving me insane. Goodnight fools.
Sometimes I wish that I could be someone else, even for one day. Wouldn't it be cool/interesting/eye-opening? I can't imagine living someone else's life, thinking how they think, and acting how they act; I would love to be able to do so. It would surely make me realize that I have a pretty damn easy life and maybe it'd even make me be glad I am who I am (which lets be real, I AM glad I am who I am most of the time).
Lately I have just been in a slump. I feel tired, sick, depressed and worn out. I am glad to be in school because I know it's what I want to do, but it's already killing me and I'm in the second week. That's not a good sign. I try to keep busy with extra activities because when I get bored nothing good comes of it. I've been going to a few basketball games a week, coaching my 7th and 8th grade team, and shootin' some hoops myself and I love it.
I have the best family on the freakin' planet. Be jeal. They love me for me, even though I do some pretty dumb shit sometimes. My parents are some of the most understanding people I know and it makes my job of being me a lot easier. Although we don't agree on most things politically..or otherwise, I know they love me no matter what I choose to do; not everyone can say that. My friends are simply amazing. The friends I spend every day with to the friends I haven't seen in months-- you're all wonderful. Thanks for putting up with me.
With all of these things it seems I should be a lot happier and upbeat than I feel lately. I feel like I should be floating around on cloud 9 with all the other happy people...but I'm not. Maybe it's the snowy weather that's making me blue, maybe it's the fact that I miss my sister more than I've ever missed anyone before, or maybe my lungs being hacked up every time I cough is the determining factor in my depressed state. Whatever the reason might be, I hope that it quickly passes me by so that I can return to my normal, okay-with-my-life-self. Til then, sorry I'm emo.
Sometimes when I wake up I find notes from Joey that go something like this:
"Dear Jill, I love you. Put more music on my ipod. Thanks. I love you so much.
love, your favorite brother Joey"
*I get at least one note a week. At least he knows he's my fav. Love that little freakin' buff guy...who can now beat me up and win at arm wrestles. Ah, shiz.
Recently a few friends and I have been trying desperately to think of ways to escape the black hole in which we live. I mean, yes, we can get out pretty easily. We could go anywhere in the world, right? Right. But we want to make the cost of leaving far outweigh staying in our humble little town. We don't want to settle for less than we currently have, which is quite great...most of the time.
After much brainstorming and consideration, we have decided that we are going to move to New York City, Hawaii (anywhere), or Southern California. Why you ask? We are going to open a bar. It will be called "Meet Me Upstairs" and there will be no stairs. We like it. We like it so much that we have, quite literally, signed our names in blood that we are going to do this; trying to convince us that it's not a good idea will not work. We've past the point of rationality about this subject, trust me.
We've decided that while having a bar will be fun, entertaining, and hopefully somewhat profitable, we also want "day time"/real? jobs. During the day, Meet Me Upstairs will turn into what we haven't named yet but will be the home to our very own grilled cheese cafe. A dream come true in my world, if I do say so myself. "Meet Me Upstairs" will also house a beauty salon (we're still looking for a beautician if anyone is interested), a tattoo parlor and a t-shirt shop. We're gonna be busy, busy, busy.
Wish us luck...not that we need it since we're all pretty freaking amazing.
Oh, and the "set" time frame for this to happen is within three years. We figure we'll all get our degrees so that people can come bull shit with us all day long about intellectual things. We'll see...
What time of year you ask? The time where I make a lot of resolutions, set out to accomplish them all, and usually only stick to one or two. This year is gonna be different though; I'm gonna make goals that I can/will keep. Here are my "resolutions" for 2010, baby. They are in no particular order at this point in time, although I guess I should probably rank them since that's what goal-oriented people do. I'll get to that someday.
This year I want to pass all my classes (again). Not only do I want to pass them, but I'm gonna get B's or better in all of them. Yep, you read that correctly.
Get/stay at least semi-organized. I don't mean I'm going to have my room/bathroom spotless, although that'd be nice. What I'm talking about is on a much more simple level. I got a wallet for myself for Christmas and it'd be cool if I actually used it so that I don't lose my debit card, license and student ID every day. Baby steps...
Get my damn DUI taken care of once and for all. At this point I could care less what happens. It's been 8 months and still nothing has been done, for better or for worse. Yes, I wish I didn't have it but I do so now I just want to be done with it.
Be a better friend, daughter, sister, co-worker, etc... If I say I'm gonna do something, do it.
Live more. Sometimes I worry too much and don't let loose enough. I want to be spontaneous, while still responsible. I want to take random trips, go on adventures, and have an awesome year!
Hope everyone has a wonderful new year!! 2010, oh yeah!
Sometimes I wish I could go back to the carefree, fun times. 
Hope your weekend is stellar! 
Yes, I'm freaking out that I'm turning 25 because I have absolutely no idea where my life is going and where I'll end up next...but I guess that's also what I love about my life so much. I have nothing tying me down or holding me in one spot. I am free to blow with the wind; I hope I never get tied down. 
I love Scrabble so much that I want to dedicate an entire room to the cause if I ever get my own pad. I want a Scrabble table (Lily has an amazing one), clock, pictures, pillows, etc. Trust me, I have it all planned out. It will be awesome. And then maybe one day I'll play in a Scrab tourny. How RAD would that be?!
I'm totally fried from fake tanning. Wait, before you judge me, hear me out. Last night I was having one of the most bitch-tastic nights of my life...as in I was being a bitch. My dear friend, Britt, and I decided to eat food and go tanning. Fake tanning. It was lightly snowing (actually I don't remember if it was really snowing or not, but it adds a little somethin' to the story), I was cold as hell (if hell is cold), and I needed me some sunlight. What better way to solve Bitch Fest 2010 than to fake bake? None I tell you.
After a rousing game of BINGO and a nice chat with the G-rents I headed to the SUU women's bball game with my cousin. Not only did the girls win in double overtime, we scored some sweet SUU t-shirts. I love free t-shirts!
